An Ocean of Lies in this Perfect World

Questionable Choices

I used to have it all. A lover who cared and loved, friends who's company I enjoyed and enjoyed my company, and a dream to pursue. Now what? I've lost all of it. Terrible mistakes and bad choices have led me down a path of self-destruction. What could I have done differently? So many things. I am at fault for everything that is happening to me. These are the consequences of my actions. I must live with this rotting regret deep in my heart. These emotionally scars that I inflicted upon myself. Who would I be if I took the right turn? Where would I be now if I did? Would I be smiling once more with the person that I love? Or would I still have ended up in the ditch that I am? All these questions are answered only with more questions. There is no such thing as a solid answer. Only despair and time can mend the wounds.

Life is not bad. Plenty of things to do if you're in the right side of things. However, if you're not, then what? What is there to achieve other than getting out of the wrong side. You're stuck there. You can't ask for help, nobody wants to help. You can't survive off of will power alone. You have to analyze and work with the very little that you have. Sometimes, one must use perseverance and patience to their advantage. Although, there is never a complete certainty that anything will work. All could be for naught, and there is nothing that can be done. If only it was easier to simply move on.