Chapter 1

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Ten years. Ten ongoing years of torture from an unloving mother. Oh but not for my twin sister, she's the angel of the house. More like the whore of the house. My mother treats her like gold while I get treated like shit. Ally gets all the expensive things she's ever wanted, even if my mom can barely afford this house alone.

Sitting in the cellar, I waited for a command for me to go to school. A four-year-old shirt fits loosely over my starved body. My mother makes sure that she can have me feel pain in the worst ways possible. I try to keep my blond hair untangled and somewhat fine, so I comb through it with my fingers. It's still a greasy, bedraggled mess though.

"Get up here and go to school, little shit!" my mother hollers at me from upstairs, while I hear my sister snicker. I trudge upstairs, and try to make a bolt out the door.

"Not so fast." My mother barks and grabs my wrists painfully tight. She takes a knife and slits my wrists yet again, making it look like I harmed myself. I don’t wince and her face falls. I'm used to the pain it brings, which isn't as bad as other things she does to me.

She slaps my face and tells me to go, so I sprint out of the house. On the way to school, which is five blocks away, I count the steps it takes my to get there. I lose count as kids from a nearby bus, going to drop kids off at school, point their windows and laugh at me. Even the bus driver is into it, slowly driving and smiling maliciously at me. I keep my head down, trying to block them out, but I know that I deserve it. I am the reason my dad is gone.

The day goes by slow in school. I don't pay too much attention to the subjects, since, as my mother constantly tells me, I'll get nowhere in life. At lunch I sat completely alone, since my only friend, Hannah, is sick today. She goes through the same crap as me, except she doesn't deserve it.

At the end of the school day, I know that my mom doesn't get home until 5:00pm so I decide to stay in the music room and go home later. In the music room, my feet automatically go towards the piano and my hands drift across it. I sit down and play a few notes, then I take off my jacket that now reveals my scars, knowing that no one ever comes in here after school, and start to play and sing.

Step one you say we need to talk

He walks you say sit down it's just a talk

He smiles politely back at you

You stare politely right on through

Some sort of window to your right

As he goes left and you stay right

Between the lines of fear and blame

And you begin to wonder why you came

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend

Somewhere along in the bitterness

And I would have stayed up with you all night

Had I known how to save a life

Let him know that you know best

Cause after all you do know best

Try to slip past his defense

Without granting innocence

Lay down a list of what is wrong

The things you've told him all along

And pray to God, he hears you

And pray to God, he hears you

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend

Somewhere along in the bitterness

And I would have stayed up with you all night

Had I known how to save a life

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