"Do you know what this is?" I ask him as he makes his way down my body "I don't want you to get attached"
"Nah" His voice is muffled, and he doesn't look back up at me. I roll my head back and let him do his thing and let my mind wander to the person that's been occupying my mind recently. I don't feel bad about picturing someone else because I'm sure he's done the same before.
"Do you want to have sex?" He asks with an adorable flush on his cheeks.
"Yeah" I say and nod in confirmation "Do you?"
"Obviously" He laughs a bit before getting his wallet to find a condom. He doesn't take long to put it on and before he tries to put it in he fingers me for a bit longer to make sure I'm ready. Perks of having sex with someone who used to be in a relationship for 3 years is that they know they can't just go straight into it the first time.
He's hovering over me and gives me a look that is as if to say 'you ready?' I nod again and move my head to the side so he kisses my cheek when he leans in. I don't do kissing but maybe in a little while if I wanna picture the one I really want I will.
"Ahh" I gasp slightly as it hurts a little.
"Sorry, I'll go slow" he inches in slowly but I kinda like the way it hurts so I pull him fully into me and he moans while I kinda groan but continue to move my hips from beneath him. Then I let him take control and do his own thing. Mainly because I didn't realise just how tired I was and the alcohol in my system was causing me to get a headache.
We spoke about some random shit during and I was laughing a few times because it was kinda awkward because I can never take anything seriously and even started talking about other people. After he finished he went down on me again and made sure I was okay with everything.
Laying next to him afterwards felt comfortable, he just kept smiling at me with a shocked but glad expression on his face.
"What?" I asked him, feeling self conscious now the alcohol was leaving my system.
"Nothing, I just didn't expect this at all" He shrugged and just looked up to the ceiling in thought.
"If I talk to you about someone would that be weird?"
"Uhm, no go ahead"
We talked for an hour before I fell asleep. The last thing I remember saying is asking him to be my distraction.
