There he is. I stared at him intently as he paved his way to me, I wanted to talk to him, curse him, demand, for him to show even just a bit of interest at me, or to at least acknowledge my presence, because it felt like hell not having him by my side, I wanted to hurt him too; Because I am staring to hate him. But mostly I—
I miss him,
I missed that smile on his face when he greets me first thing in the morning. The weird and funny faces he makes when I’m sad.
I missed the way I used to shuffle his hair when he’s sleeping, I missed doing duets with him.
I miss the way we argue over small things and would always end up laughing because we can’t stay annoyed at each other for a long time.
I missed all the things we do together.
I missed him, so much, too much.
I stared and stared, then blinked, waking up in a trance “Hades,” I called as he passed through me, he stopped but did not bother to turn around and face me,
“Hey, I- I um can we talk?” I asked stumbling on my words, because after two months, I finally had the courage to talk to him again, and I just can’t form the right thing to say at this moment because I felt like I’ve lost all my senses, because he’s here and he’s near.
“No.” He said, then continued walking. My heart sank. How? How do you manage to break my heart when it’s already in pieces?
No! I won’t waste this chance, so I walked towards him, and stopped, facing him.
“Why not?” I’m sure by now I’m getting weird glances by my schoolmates, because back then we’re always together, all the time; I didn’t know how we ended up like this too.
I heard whispers all around, but I didn’t mind to look around, I'm still waiting for his reply, but there didn’t come any. He just stared and walked away and I was left behind, being stared at.
I then quickly mustered myself and found my way out of that place, I need to go home, after what happened I couldn’t gather up the courage to still stay in school, and the possibility of us crossing each other’s paths and him pretending not to know my existence.
That’s just too much for me today.
I arrived home just in time for lunch, mom's kinda surprised to see me, mind you I was never really the kind to cut classes, I’m grade conscious, that’s why. Mom made her way to me and kissed my cheek “Asteria sweety, are you fine? Why are you home early?” I kissed her cheek back and muttered a simple, “I’m fine mom” and walked to my room.
I then lay down in my bed facing my drawer when my eyes drifted to a familiar photograph of Hades and I, in my nightstand, it was taken years ago, I think I’m around four and he was six years old here. He’s my best friend, he pretty much knew everything about me, except for one thing; The way I felt for him– (such a shocker, right?) yes we are not in a relationship, we’re best friends, but I love him and I know I shouldn’t be, because I know myself that he doesn’t feel the same way. Oh how I hate clichés but here we are.
But I never told him, I can’t.
I’m too afraid for the consequences if I ever told him, I can’t risk our friendship and everything that follows when our friendship will be ruined with this stupid feelings.
And now he’s avoiding me. Great.
I didn’t even knew what went wrong.
I sighed in frustration and faced my ceiling. I closed my eyes and shut my eyes tightly. Ah, how, I wish he would just talk to me again.
