RED

The Fourth Chapter

There's happiness, and there's sadness, little bird

And then there's you. Stuck in the vortex.

"Baekhyun's not doing any better, is he?" Chanyeol asked, while skidding his bag across the long bench.

The coach hummed. There were lines on his face.

"There have been changes," Mr.Song said in a deep voice.

"What kind of changes?" Chanyeol asked politely.

"Well, he's definitely become worse," The Coach was smiling, yet his soul was mourning, "And angrier. Sadness is at least passive, but anger is a hard emotion to deal with. Anger makes people do things they regret. And too much anger and too much regret - it breaks a person, Park Chanyeol."

Chanyeol swallowed. He ignored the blunt remark hidden in those words. The Coach probably knew about the past.

"What can we do to help him?"

The coach sighed, "As of where we stand, we can do nothing. Baekhyun's in a condition where he can't be helped. Only he can help himself, and...I don't think he's willing to," The Coach looked outside the glass window. Baekhyun shot an arrow but it went nowhere.

"He doesn't even look interested, anymore," Kyungsoo said worriedly. He'd been in the office and listening to their conversation the entire time.

"That's not true," Chanyeol said quickly, "You keep looking at the end result. Baekhyun hasn't given up yet. He still comes and practices everyday. That means he's still determined!"

The Coach bit his lip, "That's true but..." He watched Baekhyun for a little longer, "I think he's just scared."

Kyungsoo frowned, "What do you mean?"

"Archery ties him to himself. He's been trained in that way. He's made archery into something that defines him. There's nothing wrong with that, really, except for the fact...that now that he's losing himself, he thinks that as long as he does archery he'll be fine; sane and alive," Chanyeol's heart sank as he realized what the Coach is saying.

"So, basically you're telling me that he's losing himself and he kind of knows that too, but he's too scared to deal with the realization that he's really not fine, so he's doing archery to keep himself from acknowledging the issue? Everyday?"

The Coach nodded, "Exactly. It's his fear and his last bit of hope that he's running at. We aren't machines but we do need fuel to do something. Earlier, Baekhyun did archery because he felt like it helped ascertain his supremacy. I wasn't his Coach then but I think he did it more for the public than himself-"

"You're wrong," Chanyeol stated bluntly, "Baekhyun did archery because he loved it. It helped him find his freedom and self-worth in a house like his. He didn't like falling back on the 'Byun' name to help him. He wanted to be free. Archery was his freedom, and he loved archery. He loved the constant practice. He loved shooting."

There was silence before the Coach said, "You just used past tense. Does he not love archery anymore?"

He hesitated before answering but a look at Baekhyun's careless shooting brought him to the answer anyway -

"I don't know what he's trying to do now. He's lost."

Communicating with Baekhyun was harder these days. The shorter had completely closed himself up, like a snail that had retreated to its shell. His answers were short, monotonous, and even when you talked to him, he wasn't really present. He was just a floating spirit, translucent and not really there. Sometimes, Chanyeol got goosebumps as he thought that, maybe, one day Baekhyun would just fade. His sadness wasn't very noticeable. The house was normal, everything was fine, except for its residents. Baekhyun had locked himself in. He was so small and never there.