The Blue Neighborhood

Talk me down

(3/3)

Zhan was shocked was an understatement. It is that never had he thought that Yibo would have feelings for him romantically. Yibo was a guy, just like him, shouldn't he feel disgusted? But did he? Well, no. Contrary to that Zhan wasn't really sure what he was feeling. To tell you the truth, he felt quite warm thinking he was capable of having Yibo's heart while the nation was dying to even have a glance from
Yibo. No! What was he thinking?! It wasn't right!

He had taken the day off, and now he had nothing to do. Turning the t.v. on, he sat on the luxurious couch of his hotel room to stop thinking about anything else, for now. He didn't know how, but he stopped at Hunan tv channel where an old episode from Day Day Up was showing. It was the episode about singles and some of the hosts were being paired with the girls that visited to eat hotpot if their answers matched.

As Zhan saw Yibo being paired with a girl that looked like a foreigner but spoke Chinese he unconsciously snorted. 'Hmmph.., in what angle was the girl better than him'. When Yibo's and the girl's 1st answer matched Zhan gnawed on his lower lip in displeasure. When at the second round they failed Zhan sighed in relief. 'Even if it was a game Yibo's answers weren't allowed to match with anyone else's, but him.'

When Xiao Zhan suddenly realized what he was thinking he pulled his hair in frustration and screamed, "Ahhhhhhh!!!! What am I even thinking?!!!! I should not worry about these things!!!!!!!!! Calm down, Zhan!!"

Xiao Zhan took deep breaths and let it out slowly. After he finally calmed down he thought about the things he should be worried about, I.e. what if Yibo really stopped being friends with him? He, for sure, didn't want that! But what Yibo wanted could he give him? If Yibo was a girl he wouldn't have to think so much with the matter. He would have more than happily accepted Yibo's heart. But...but... Yibo was a guy. He sighed in discontentment. There was no one with whom he could even share this important matter with.

In a society like China where being gay was such a grave sin, even if he agreed to be something more than friends with Yibo, how long would it actually last? Did they even have a future? What would their parents think? Wouldn't they have to hide it for the rest of their life, unless they decided to escape to some other country and seek refuge.

'What is he supposed to then?', Zhan thought as he took his face in his hands.

Sooner or later he will have to make a decision. Maybe he will make a selfish decision then.

A week later Yibo was discharged completely, and as soon as he came out of the hospital he was dragged out of his home by Seungyoun, his group mate and dearest friend. Seungyoun was taking him out for a boys day out and, yes, he had already contacted Yibo's doctor who said it was fine and won't have any impact on Yibo's health. Though Yibo was in a sour and depressed mood he went with his friend's demands.

They were sitting in a cozy cafe which could be said a celebrity cafe and kept unnecessary fan or sasaeng troubles away.

" So what happened? Tell me the truth. Every bit of it!", Seungyoun said sipping his white chocolate mocha,  and narrowing his eyes on Yibo,who dodged his eyes and looked more interested on his chocolate latte.

Yibo sighed and then opened his mouth unwillingly, " I... I.. told him about my feelings."

Seungyoun choked on his mocha, " What?! You told him about your feelings?!"

Yibo rolled his eyes and crossed his arms, " Yeah, that's what I said. I just couldn't stop myself."

" Okay, and how did he react? Did he reject you?"

"He said that I didn't meant what I was saying and that I wasn't thinking straight.", Yibo said as he looked outside the window.

" That's good then.", Seungyoun said with a small smile.