Changing Fate (Book 2: We're The Same But Different)

23

AT FIRST, the Valdez method worked fine.
We found nothing to blow up, but we also didn't have to overthink anything.
This was because we embraced the McCaffrey method as well, which involved
chia seeds.
Faced with a choice of which corridor to take from the throne room, Meg
pulled a soggy package of seeds from her red high-top. (I did not ask why she kept
seeds in her shoes.) She caused the chia to sprout in her cupped palm, and the tiny
forest of green stalks pointed toward the left-hand corridor.
"That way," Meg announced.
"Awesome superpower," Leo said. "When we get out of here, I'ma hook you
up with a mask and a cape. We'll call you Chia Girl."
I hoped he was kidding. Meg, however, looked delighted.
The chia sprouts led us down one corridor then another. For an underground
lair in the Indianapolis sewer system, the palace was quite opulent. The floors
were rough-hewn slate, the gray stone walls decorated with alternating tapestries
and television monitors showing—you guessed it—videos of Commodus. Most of
the mahogany doors were labeled with engraved bronze plates: COMMODUS
SAUNA, COMMODUS GUEST ROOMS 1–6, COMMODUS EMPLOYEE CAFETERIA, and, yes,
COMMODUS COMMODES.
We saw no guards, no employees, no guests. The only person we encountered
was a maid coming out of the COMMODUS IMPERIAL GUARD BARRACKS with a basket
of dirty laundry.
When she saw us, her eyes widened in terror. (Probably because we looked
dirtier and damper than anything she'd pulled from the Germani's hamper.) Before
she could scream, I knelt before her and sang "You Don't See Me" by Josie and the Pussycats. The maid's eyes became misty and unfocused. She sniffled
nostalgically, walked back into the barracks, and closed the door behind her.
Leo nodded. "Nice one, Apollo."
"It wasn't hard. That tune is wonderful for inducing short-term amnesia."
Meg sniffed. "Would've been kinder to hit her over the head."
"Oh, come now," I protested. "You like my singing."
Her ears reddened. I remembered how young McCaffrey had cried when I
poured out my heart and soul in the giant ants' lair at Camp Half-Blood. I'd been
rather proud of my performance, but I guess Meg did not feel like reliving it.
She punched me in the gut. "Come on."
"Ow."
The chia seeds led us deeper into the emperor's compound. Silence began to
weigh on me. Imaginary insects crawled across my shoulder blades. Surely
Commodus's men had dealt with the front-door incursion by now. They would be
returning to their normal posts, perhaps checking security monitors for other
intruders.
At last, we turned a corner and spotted a blemmyae keeping watch outside a
metal vault door. The guard wore black dress pants and shiny black shoes, but he
made no attempt to hide his chest-face. The hair across his shoulders/scalp was
clipped in a military flattop. The wire of a security earpiece ran from beneath his
armpit to his pants pocket. He did not appear to be armed, but that gave me no
comfort. His meaty fists looked quite capable of crushing a pedal boat or a Lester
Papadopoulos.
Leo grumbled under his breath, "Not these guys again." Then he forced a smile
and strode toward the guard. "Hello! Lovely day! How are you?"
The guard turned in surprise. I imagined that proper procedure would have
been to alert his superiors to the intrusion, but he'd been asked a question. It
would've been rude to ignore it.
"I'm fine." The guard couldn't seem to decide between a friendly smile or an
intimidating glower. His mouth spasmed, which made him look like he was doing
an ab exercise. "I don't think you're supposed to be here."
"Really?" Leo kept marching forward. "Thank you!"
"You're welcome. Now if you'll please raise your hands."
"Like this?" Leo ignited his hands and torched the blemmyae's chest-face.
The guard stumbled, choking on flames, batting his huge eyelashes like burning
palm fronds. He groped for the button on the microphone attached to his earpiece.
"Post twelve," he croaked. "I've got—"
Meg's twin golden swords scissored across his midsection, reducing him to a
pile of yellow dust with a partially melted earpiece.

A voice warbled from the tiny speaker. "Post twelve, please repeat."
I grabbed the device. I had no desire to wear something that had been in a
blemmyae's armpit, but I held the speaker next to my ear and spoke into the mic.
"False alarm. Everything is hunky-dorky. Thank you."
"You're welcome," said the voice in the speaker. "Daily passcode, please."
"Why, certainly! It's—"
I threw the microphone down and crushed it under my heel.
Meg stared at me. "Hunky-dorky?"
"It sounded like something a blemmyae would say."
"That's not even the right expression. It's hunky-dory."
"A girl who says goddy is correcting my language."
"Guys," Leo said. "Keep a lookout while I take care of this door. There's gotta
be something important in here."
I kept watch while he went to work on the vault lock. Meg, not being good at
following directions, strolled back the way we'd come. She crouched and began
picking up the chia sprouts she'd dropped when summoning her swords.
"Meg," I said.
"Yeah?"
"What are you doing?"
"Chia."
"I can see that, but..." I almost said, They're only sprouts.
Then I remembered one time I'd said something similar to Demeter. The
goddess had cursed me so that every piece of clothing I put on immediately
sprouted and bloomed. Nothing is quite as uncomfortable as having your cotton
underwear burst into actual bolls of cotton, complete with stems, spurs, and seeds
right where your...Well, I think you get the idea.
Meg gathered the last of her sprouts. With one of her swords, she cracked the