Without Realisation

Convos

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Mitchell: you could have leant backwards when you were sitting on me you know.

Me: I know but that would have felt uncomfortable.

Mitchell: k.

9/september/13

Group convo

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Lana: Hey guys. I'm gonna have you all over this weekend on Saturday if you wanna come. I'm buying a pool to set up for it so bring your togs.

Blair: yay.

Skye: awesome, can't wait.

Me: cool.

Eugene: great idea Lana, this is gonna be awesome.

Mitchell: I might not be able to come.

I forgot to mention that Lana came out as bisexual at the end of grade eight and then as full lesbian at the beginning of grade nine. I'll have to admit that I've always wanted to have a "lesbian experience" at some point in my life and I did actually like Lana at the end of term one and during term two. I eventually got over it though but there was always going to be that "what if" thought running through my mind.

14/9/13

"We should play spin the bottle" Lana says.

"Okay but what's the deal? Girls kiss girls?" Blair asks.

"Yes, definitely but guys don't kiss guys" Eugene says.

"Well that's unfair". Jamie says. I forgot to mention earlier that Jamie is part of the group I sit with as well.

"No. Guys don't kiss guys. That would reck the brotherhood." Eugene says.

"Yeah". Mitchell chimes in, not really contributing to this "guys don't kiss guys" thing.

I have this suspicion that Mitchell could be gay or at least bi. I think we all do. Even my dad and Skye's dad think he his.

"Fine, whatever". Jamie gives up.

Blair, Eleanor and I had never kissed anyone before so this was going to be interesting. In this moment I was being so stupid I was with two guys that I would eventually grow to hate and six of my female friends, one being a lesbian and truly, this was not how I wanted my first kiss to be like.

For some reason Lana and Mitchell both wanted me to sit on them while seven of us were playing spin the bottle in a grass and dirt infested tiny, set up pool. Eleanor didn't want to play and Skye didn't bring any togs and she didn't really want to play either.

At this point, it was the beginning of a very big mistake Skye was making. Her and Eugene had a "thing" going on. Eugene really liked Skye and Skye was starting to really like Eugene. You could have imagined how sad Eugene would have been that he didn't get to kiss Skye. I'll get into more detail about their, "relationship" later.

"Faith come cuddle". Lana said in a babyish voice, while putting her arms out for me to hug her.

I was currently on Mitchell's lap and I started moving towards Lana.

"No don't go". Mitchell said holding on to me tightly. Aww I'm so wanted.

"I've sat on you long enough". I said and pried Mitchell's hands off of me.

"Ha ha Mitch, she likes me better". Lana laughs, making fun of him.

"Whatever". Mitchell huffs.

I was just hugging Lana and then she pulled me on to her lap. Okay...

Mitchell span the, well we had a red solo cup that we threw and whoever the bottom of the cup landed on the person who span, had to kiss them. We had to kind throw it in the air because of force and gravity, the cup wouldn't spin on the surface of the water. Logical.

The cup landed on me. Great.

"Oo Faith". Eugene, childishly said.

I hadn't kissed anyone this game yet so here comes the first kiss. Yay. Not.

"We're just doing a peck right?" I ask.

"That's what you want right?" Mitchell asks and I nod.

He leans in and we make contact but it wasn't even a kiss because I kind of blew air into his mouth because I started laughing.

"What was that?". Mitchell said and everyone laughed.

"Sorry" I say, still laughing.