The Darkness Surrounds Me

Pain

Just a quick little key, each voice is shown with a different, thing. 

Example Voice 1 Voice 2  Voice 3     All 3

~*~

Well... I'm back. It's been about a year or two since I've been here and the voices are constantly in the back of my mind... It hurts. I'm in high school now. I'm also on the school's soccer team. The only sport that I'll ever do.
But you don't care do you?

Is there anyone even reading this?

Probably not.

Even if there was, why would they care?

...

It's fine. I'm fine. Everything is FINE.

They're all going to leave you.

You'll have no one left.

Why would she ever love you?

You're such a pathetic waste of space.

Shut up. Shut up. Shut up!

I get it, ok! I get that I'm not good enough for her! I get she'll never love me! I get that I'm a fuck up! I know that I'm a disappointment to everyone I come across! I know everyone is going to leave me! I. Get. It. You don't have to keep reminding me!

...

It hurts... it hurts so freaking much..

Not even your own mother loves you.

...please... just leave me alone..

You can't run from your mind Azzie.

Might as well just come with us.

Follow us into the darkness.

You'll be safe with us.

I'll never be safe with you. I'm safer with Nichelle than I am you.

You're only going to get hurt if you keep getting attached to her.

She'll leave you just like everyone else.

She doesn't need you.

She doesn't love you.

Yes she does...

Not in the same way you love her.

No... but that's ok.

It hurts you just to see them together. Why would you want to get closer to her when you KNOW you're only going to get hurt.

I don't care if seeing them together hurts me. I don't care if I never get to call her mine. I just want her in my life and I want her to be happy whether that's with or without me.

She'll never love you.

Harmony will always mean more to her.

Well no shit sherlock. Nichelle has known Harmony for almost three years and has known me for about five months. Obviously they'd be closer. Plus it's already been said by multiple people that Nichelle would drop anything for her.

Even you?

...

Probably...

It doesn't matter. As long as she's happy. I'm working on getting over her.

With Jaren?

I like him.

Do you? Or are you just saying that to make you and Nichelle believe you're over her?

...

You deserve to be hurt if this is the stupid crap you're doing.

I hate you.

We are you.

I just want to be happy...

As long as we're around, you'll never be happy. We'll always be here to remind you of everything you hate and all of your fears.

It hurts..

Thoughts can't hurt. Give yourself real pain if you're going to complain. Turn the mental pain into something physical.

Ok...

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