Expired tears

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Even tho it happens along time ago I still feel the

memories sticking in my brain like a tape that won't unstick from your hand. 

try g to shake it off but it's only getting sticking to the other parts of your hand. I picture it like a black tar slithering in my brain yanking at my tear ducts.

I DONT WANT TO CRY, I DONT WANT TO SHED ANY MORE TEARS.!

the tears still make there way out. sliding down my face, Dripping down into a puddle on my pillow. 

I have everything I want I made it this far so why can't I stop these tears.

why can't I make this toxicity that sticks to my brain unstuck?

Haven't I won this battle in life, why must it keep attacking me in every weakness I come across. 

Searching for common answers but everything I experienced is not common. 

I kept quiet, I kept everything in, I bit my tongue till it blisters I held my breath till under my eyes turn blue.

I screamed in silence I cried in private than expected to be heard and to be seen. 
It took me a while to realize nothing can be noticed if it was never mentioned.

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