[ 02.27.20 ]
It was late at night. I was in a carnival with people of familiar faces, but somehow I could not identify. The lights were blinding. I was walking in daze and awe. I did not know where I was heading but my feet kept leading me towards who knows where. The people's screams and laughter were becoming less and less audible, slowly being masked by a piercing shrill in my head. My steps were becoming unsteady like I was about to pass out, when all the noise suddenly stopped, the lights stayed still, and a woman stood before me.
She wore a black gown made of silk running all the way down to the ground, with sleeves covering almost her entire arm up to her hand if it wasn't for those unusual long fingers with nails polished in black. The silent wind was gently blowing the ends of her clothing.
I looked up to see her face. She had smooth black hair reaching up to her shoulders. Her lips were painted plum, and her eyes were dark. Deeply dark. It was as if her stare pierces through my mind. Although, for some reason, the atmosphere around us was calm. Cold, but calm. Her presence was intimidating, but was not unpleasant.
"Are you lost, child?"
It took me a second to realize that she has engaged a conversation with me.
"Ye-no. No, I'm not." I stuttered.
"Well then what brings you here staring beyond the barricades?"
It was then that I realized I was standing near the barricades that partly surrounded the whole carnival, but it was not nothingness on the other side. It was still a part of the carnival, having all the empty but lighted rides. They seemed to be functional, so I wondered why they were not open for the people.
"I'm not sure." I answered her while staring at the empty rides.
"I'm afraid that side of this wonderland is closed for now. There are still preparations being made."
"I see."
I kept staring at the rides on the other side for no reason as my wonders slowly fade when she said with a smile on her face,
"Yes. Yes, you will."
I looked at her, confused over what she said. She gave me a last kind smile, with her eyes looking straight to mine, and then turned away as she walked towards the people walking in all different directions, slowly fading from my sight.
After a couple of seconds, I too made my way back to where the people were mostly. I wandered around for a bit, looking for the unknown yet familiar-faced people I came with, when I accidentally bumped into a young boy. He fell sitting on the ground. I was about to apologize to him, when the expression he gave me brought me to a stop. He looked at me with a surprised face, and not in a good way, with a tad of fear coming from it. I did not know what to say as he said nothing as well. It took about seven seconds of staring into each other before he decided to get up and quickly walk away with his hands tucked in the pockets of his jacket.
I just stood there for a moment, confused of what happened, of why that boy seemed to have been frightened of me. I stood there when someone suddenly bumped me from behind, bringing my hands down to the ground to support my fall. I turned my head up and there they stood, three thug-looking teens glaring down on me.
"Better watch it," said the one with the shaved head.
They walked away, but not before giving a last slight kick to my leg. I got up and swept the dust off my pants. I looked straight and in front of me was the carousel. The lights moving in circular motions put me in a daze. The music started to fade and my sight became more blurry each second. Everything was turning to white. I slowly closed my eyes as the surrounding turned quiet. I took a moment and a few breaths, before I opened back my eyes. I stood there, in front of the carousel that was still going round and round and the music still playing, along with all the other rides. I stood there, alone.
It seemed that 24 hours have passed by and I was back at the same place, but no one else was around. All the rides were still running. All but those on the other side. However, the barricades were gone. Out of the lingering curiosity in the back of my head, I decided to take a look and see what the other side holds.
Empty food stalls stood everywhere and all the rides had their lights on. Colorful flaglets were hanging above them. No one else was around but there was no eerie sensation going on. All appeared just like a normal carnival to me. All until I reached the wide bumper car area.
I walked in, footsteps audible with every land on the floor. The bumper cars were aligned on both sides. White light bulbs on the ceiling were lit. In front of me, at the other end of the whole area, were two poles that stood tall apart from each other with ropes tied on each of the poles bottom and top. In the middle was the thug-looking teen with a shaved head. The one I bumped with yesterday. He wasn't standing there. His arms and legs were where the other side of the ropes were tied to. His belly was ripped open and his guts were all over the floor. He was dead.
A lifeless body was in front of me. I was a few steps away from it. I should be scared. I should be running away. I should be anywhere but near that thing, but no. My feet took steps towards the dead body, like I wanted to see more. I wasn't feeling horrified, I was in awe. The moment I got in front of it , I raised its head and pale white eyes stared back at me. I felt nothing near scared nor disgusted. It seemed nothing to me but a dead body.
"Well," the lady from yesterday suddenly appeared beside me.
I looked her in the eye and said nothing.
"I knew you were one of us." She said.
There was a short silence between us before I broke our eye contact and looked back at the dead body hanging in front of me. She walked away with a grin. I stood there still with this lingering thought in my head. Why am I not scared?
I couldn't answer myself no matter how hard I tried to understand it, and so I decided to take a step back and a deep breath. Then, I felt someone's presence around, like someone was looking at me. I quickly turned my head to my left out of instinct and there I saw the boy with the jacket from yesterday. He was looking at me, with fear written all over his face. His legs were shaking in terror. He couldn't say a word. I didn't, either. I just looked at him. Blank. It was around three seconds that we were looking at each other before he had the guts to move. He ran off scared as he could be, and I stayed still with only one thought in my head,
"He's gonna die too."
I woke up.
