Time to Wish

Wrong Wish

A chilling disappointment. A trust that I've broken with my inner self. I try shaking my grieving anger off, but I can't. I can't handle screaming my lungs out. Why did I do it. I didn't mean to, I promise. A spark of truth ignites realization.
Lucy you hated your life . You're getting what you wished for.

No. No. No. I didn't mean it please...please let me live.

Let's rewind:
Leaning against the railing of the roof of the apartment I finally break down. I let the tears bath me as I keep remembering the pain that has struck me like poison in my veins. I knew mother never really wish I was born ,such a burden, but hearing her scream those exact words to me,just ,I don't know, killed me. Up here I had such an attraction to get to the ground,but through jumping from above. Yes, I want to die,an easy painless death,now. I just don't got the guts to carry through suicide. How the hell am I suppose to keep living if everyday I have to see my mother and be reminded that I am unwanted? You may think that i over reacting,but no. You see everyone hates me for being ugly,stupid,worthless. That's why I am a toy for bullies at school. A pity getter from people who see my bruising. A razor's reminder of blood. That's when I finally loose it and scream to the seven skies my pain.
"I fucking wish I was dead."
I truly do kill me and I will rest. I got no goals, nobody to keep me alive. Why even try? As those words are released from my mouth I faintly hear the echo of foot steps behind me.
"What's wrong dear?" A rough yet tender voice creeps in my ears.
"N-n-nothing"I stumble to say partly because I am startled that anyone else would be up hear.
"Oh no no you look like a wrecked ship and you going to tell me nothing is wrong to hell."
"I am just going through some shit lately, okay"
"Don't need to be giving me attitude, I am not the one who made you wish you were dead, first of all."
"Sorry."
"Much better. You big on wishing huh?"
"Kind of I guess, when I was smaller I was more of a believer that wishes did come true, now in days not really."
"Honey,how would you like a god-mother?"
"Is you high?" I say with my back still to her.
"Um, no. Of course not. All I am saying is that I can make all your wishes come true. What do you say? Deal?"
"Yeah,whatever, just leave me alone." I mumble after not listening to a word she said.
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Authors note: Do you guys like this beginning is it too sappy? Comment what you think or message me about it.