Fight for You (Kellin Quinn Love Story)

Chapter Eight .

Armani's POV-

My eyes are heavy with sleep as I rub them. I feel like crap, maybe it's from crying all last night, or maybe it's just a small cold. I don't really know, and I don't really want to. I pull my legs over the side of the bed and steady myself, pushing back my hair with a sigh.

"Armani! Breakfast!" Jesse shouts for the second time. I grumble something unintelligent under my breath and make my way downstairs. I'm not in the mood for the boys usual bantering and joking around.

To my surprise it's deadly quiet, my feet sounds big and loud as I come down the stairs, stopping for a moment at the corner and thinking to myself what was going on. Then I take a step around the corner and see only Jesse and Kellin sitting at the table, digging into eggs and bacon.

"Where are the rest of the boys?" I ask, avoiding all eye contact with Kellin. I don't want him to see that I've been crying.

"They went home silly." Jesse laughs, ruffling my hair as I take a seat next to him.

"Oh....I forgot they actually didn't live here." Both Jesse and Kellin chuckle at my comment. It's true, those boys are always here.

I look up at Kellin for the first time, "So why are you still here?" I try my best not to sound mean.

"I'm staying to help Jesse with some studio stuff in the basement." He answers  never lifting his head to meet my gaze. I look back down at my plate of cheesey eggs and bacon and suddenly feel sick. I hate eggs and I'm not in the mood to eat. I push the plate away from my face and lay my head on the table in my hands.

"What's wrong Mani?" Jesse says, putting a hand on my back. His hands are cold and send shivers down my spine.

"I just don't feel good, I must be getting a little sick." I commplain, My voice is filled with agony.

"Aw, maybe you should lie down for the day. Me and Kellin will try and be quiet down in the basement."

"Alright, I'm gonna' go watch tv upstairs then." I say, getting up and putting my full plate in the garbage. The eggs making me feel even sicker.

I've spent about an hour now watching batman episodes and snuggling up in my thousands of blankets. The warmth consumes me and makes me feel sleepy and out of it. The only thing keeping my eyelids from closing is a knock at the door.

"C'mon in!" I mutter, collecting myself a bit as Kellin walks in. I roll my eyes at him. I'm in no shpe to argue right now so he better make this quick.

"Can we talk?" he asks me, sitting at the edge of my bed and blocking my view from Harley Quinn and the Joker.

"Go ahead and talk then." I say with a yawn of boredom.

"No Armani, I mean can we really talk? I'm not in the mood to argue either you know?" His words pierce my mind and force myself up again.

"What is there to talk about it? I think staying out of each others way and letting me be happy with my fiance is the best thing to do anymore." I say, starting probably another argument with him.

To my dismay Kellin just sighs and gets up, "I knew I shouldn't do this." he says with a shake of his head.

"Wait." I let out, even though I desperately didn't want to stop him, "What do you mean?" I continue. Kellin turns around and stares at me for a second, I can't tell what he's going to do and it's kind of scaring me.

"I want to talk to you Armani. Not about your fiance or how much you hate me. Or whats wrong with me and you. I just wanted to talk to you the way we were always able to. I don't get why things need to be so complicated when your happy and I care about you. Sometimes whats wrong is that we have so much to say but no one to tell because were too busy being angry at the only person who can listen to us." He stops but his eyes don't leave mine, those big hazel eyes still staring into mine. "But I'll go now." he finishes, turning on his heel again.

"So I'm going back to school in a week." I blurt out, not knowing what else to say, what else I can say to make him stay.

He turns back around taking another step closer to me, "Oh really? Are you excited?" He asks, a huge grin stretching across his face, and for the first time it doesn't seem as painful as the others.

"Yeah, I can finally pour myself back into my projects. I think I might move out and stay down there in the city." I smile, this time Kellin nods and sits down next to me on the warm bed.

"Are you serious?" He says still smiling like the idiot I know.

"Yep! I think I might even open my own shop after school, will you promise to be my first customer?" I ask feeling myself lighten up a tad.

"I promise, I'll let you tattoo anything you want on me. Even if its a fucking penis on my forehead." he says making us both laugh contagiously.

"Yay! I'll even give you a discount since your my best friend." I say but even Kellin stops laughing and takes in what I just said. Best friend? I can't believe it came out of my own mouth, it just slipped between my words and appeared before us both.

"Aww thanks Mani!" He said beginning to laugh again. I felt all the pressure evaporate from my shoulders and the air suddenly felt so much lighter.

We talked for a while about all the little things, I told him about my latest art project for school and what I was planning to do with the rest of my life. He told me about tour and how he can't wait to start writing for their next album again. He talked about how Gabe's been a goofball lately and where he wants to go for vacation with the guys and me next year. It was all so easy for a while but both of us had ran out of things to say and now all that was left was the serious talk we needed to have.

"I lied Armani..." Kellin said giving my a sad smile. We were both now laying across my bed tired and watching batman still.

"I know." I said returning the smile.

"I have to say it. You can hate me forever, you can kill me!" He says making me giggle a little. I know whats coming and yet I can't seem to stop him from saying it.

"I think you're making a mistake in marrying him so soon. You haven't been with him long enough, and how do you know if you truely love him. Maybe I'm wrong, maybe I'm just being a stupid, irritating and annoying best friend who just wants to watch out for you. And I know I'm suppose to be looking out for you and your happiness, so maybe I shouldn't have told you you were wrong last night. If you really love him and are happy then I'm not going to stop you. I want you to  smile everyday Armani. If Casey makes you smile every moment of the day and your heart can't take being without him then go ahead and live with him forever. But don't rush into this, you're so young and you're not even done school yet. Dammit you were always reckless and crazy but I have to say you've never been wrong Armani. I just want to be there for you..."

It takes me a while to let his words actually soke into me, to let me obsorb all that information. I feel every word with my entire body.

"I understand what you're saying Kel...I know what you mean but before I can even answer you I need to say some stuff too. And now you can't get mad. You can't sigh and not listen to me." He nods in agreement ant waits nervously for what I have to say.

"We can't keep avoiding what happen the night you left for tour so many months ago. I told you how much I liked you and you left with no words. For all those months we didn't say a word to each other. For all those months I felt the pain of heart break and then suddenly Casey showed up, with a hand to hold and a shoulder to cry on. He listened when all I did was talk about you. He made me fall for him so simply and he didn't even have to say a word. Then he does speak, he asks me to marry him and I say yes. I felt like that's what I wanted to say because I was so in love with the way he listened. With the way he let me fall apart and shut down so often. But sometimes I need someone to speak. To yell at me or to make me upset. I love him and yet I'm scared he loves me too much to be that person."

"Mani...." Kellin voice is low and I can tell that he doesn't know what to say. He can't find the sweet inbetween of being my brothers best friend and my best friend.

So I continue, "I just want my best friend to be there for me." I finish, placing my hand over Kellin's.

"Okay, I can do that." Kellin finally speaks up, smiling that cheesey smile I fell for once. I look away as he locks our hands together, and back at the tv screen. I can't tell if I liked that conversation or hated it with a burning passion.