Euphoria

Project Baby

Paisli Brooks. 25 years old.

Today is one of those nice days that people in the neighborhood look forward to. Sun out, birds chirping, everyone sitting on their stoops talking shit. The old men watching the young girls prance around in their shorts that cuffed their big or little to no asses. The young girls heading to the blocks that are swarmed with niggas who's diamonds danced off their wrist. The block boys whistling at the girls whose skin showed more than their clothes. A normal day in the hood with the weather was sunny and nice.

That's what Paisli thought about staring out through the blinds. The sun shined on her legs and she felt the warmth from that taking her back to her home. The days she spent outside.

''Ms.Brooks?'' She blinks as the warmth went away. Remembering where she is. She looks back at her therapists as she sat with her glasses on over her almond brown round eyes. Dominican black hair slicked back into a bun, normal floral blouse with pink and white flowers, and a white skirt. Paisli thought this bitch is wearing white, she's risky. Paisli fidgeted with her ring finger, where a ring sat. Shining bright with the sun on it. This ring is why she's sitting in this office.

''I'm sorry. I just like when it's nice out.'' ''Does it being nice out bring any memories out for you?'' She sighs. The therapist could sense how the sun relaxed Paisli but it also slowed down her thought process. ''It takes me back home, I used to be outside all the time. Even if it was to just sit on someone's curb or stoop. I was outside.'' ''Back when you lived in the projects, correct?'' ''Yeah... When I lived in New York I couldn't even touch the doorknob.'' She watched as Paisli smile faded. ''The projects raised me, but New York made me''.

Paisli then fixes herself, she asks could she grab a bottle of water before taking her place back on the couch across from the woman. ''What brought you here today, Ms. Brooks?'' She lifts her left hand first towards her face then to the therapist. ''This ring'' She spits out. ''Which is very pretty'' ''It's drop-dead gorgeous. I just don't know if... I deserve it'' ''Why do you say that? First is it an engagement ring or are you married?'' ''Engagement.'' ''Congratulations'' ''Thank you.'' ''you don't seem that excited''. Paisli blows air between her lips. ''I don't know what's wrong with me. After everything I've been through in the last 8 years, you'd think I'd want to get married to him, it's just-'' ''something or someone is holding you back'' ''Are you asking or telling me?'' ''Telling. It's all in your demeanor.'' ''Is it something or someone?'' ''Someone'' Paisli snaps her fingers at her therapist as a gesture that she's sort of correct. ''It's that but then it's also me.'' ''What about you?'' ''He thinks he's not trying to change me but he is'' The lady fixes her glasses opening her notebook. ''You mentioned you're from the projects. Is that what he's trying to change?'' ''Yes. It runs through my veins, everything about me is 'project baby' he tries to say he doesn't want to change me and then my perfectly box braided hair needs to be silk pressed like some white woman'' She clears her throat writing something down in her notebook.

''Let's talk about where you're from. Like, let's start from the beginning so I can understand you more. Then as the story progresses... we can truly understand this someone who's holding you back which I presume you met in the hood?'' Paisli scoffs rubbing her nose. ''These sessions are strictly confidential, yes?'' ''100%. Whatever you tell me in here today will not be gossip outside of here. I could get my license revoked for such behavior'' She nods. Exhaling, Paisli gets comfortable. Her story of the last 8 years still shocks her at how she's still standing.

''Let's start with who raised Paisli Brooks, who was Paisli Brooks 8 years ago?''

''Paisli Brooks was a 17-year-old fast ass pretty girl from the projects of North Philadelphia.''

****

8 years prior..

Summertime in the hood is like the best time of the year. Everyone is outside, everyone is smiling, everyone is at ease. The only thing the summertime brought to the hood was a lot of tragedy and drama. If someone wasn't getting killed, there were fights in the middle of the street. Everyone knew everyone, the hood may seem big but it's very small.