just friends

1

Hayley and Hannah have been friends since the first year of high school. Haileys best friend Charlie who she had been friends with since they were 3 years old started talking to Hannah at an after school club. Hannah has gone to another school before highschool but Hayley and Charlie had met Hannah two years before highschool started at a youth club.

At the start of year 7 Hayley had a small group of friends who she was very close to. At lunch she would sit with them all, her, Charlie,
James and Jess in one group with Alex and Tom in a group next to them with a few people they had made friends with. Hayley had a huge crush on Alex before highschool started. She never wanted to go out with him but just being near him made her feel like she was going to pass out. Back in year 6 charlie and Jess both liked Alex aswell but Charlie ended up going out with him and Jess asked out his best friend, Tom.

During that year at school Hayley was a mess. Things were awful at home, her uncle had been beaten up and was put in hospital. There was a very low chance of him living. Hayleys father also emotionally abuses her and her mother. Hayley was blamed for everything that goes wrong in. The house even if she wasn't there. He complained about Charlie saying he dosent like her trying to get Hayley to fall out with her. She also wasn't aloud a boyfriend and if either her or her brother were gay then they were getting kicked out. During that time Hayley didn't think there was anything to worry about, she "loves" Alex. She had never liked a girl, girls were super pretty though, she had also thought about marrying her friend Lilly Is she also wasn't in a relationship so neither of them are lonely. But that's just a straight girl looking after her friend, who just happens to be very pretty and that if Hayley was a boy she would maybe go out with her. She wasn't a boy though so there is no chance, girls kissing is gross, she would never date another girl. She wasn't meaning to be homophobic in anyway but she just thought girls kissing was disgusting and she would never ever do it.

⚠️[trigger warning]⚠️
All of these things started to mess with Hayley. At age 11 she was cutting her wrists not wanted to live anymore. She hadn't told anyone about it but Alex might have known. James had started making jokes about depression and Hayley had told him to shut up and that it was a mental illness and people could control it. Alex was looking at her arm. James had said "it's not like you have depression" after he had said that Hayley had turned away from him and carried on with her work.
[tw over]
After that day James always hugged her and spoke to her a lot. He made Hayley feel happy and gave her a reason to live. She depended on him. If something good happened she would go to bed happy not crying at all, but if something bad did happen there would be marks on her arms. With him having another girlfriend every week this did not make Hayley feel good.