My Time With You

7

After about three weeks of not visiting Ai Type at the hospital.

My life was monotone and boring.

I ate, drank, talked to people and went to college.

But I didn't pay much attention to anything or anyone.

I went back home after classes and decided to ignore my homework after all.

I layed on my bed and stared at the ceiling for what felt like hours.

I tossed and turned in the bed but couldn't get any sleep.

I haven't had a proper rest in what felt like years.

My mind was bustling with thoughts of him.

My memories with him.

My time with him.

And the long days I spent taking care of him.

The times I watched him crying in fear from his nightmares.

And the times I did my best to comfort him.

I miss him.

I want to see him so bad.

I want to hug him and kiss him and tell him that he's going to be ok.

But he wants me to go.

I sighed and stood up then took my keys and went to AINU.

Maybe drinking will help.

I lost count of how many shots I had but my mind was getting hazy and my vision started to blur.

"Ai Tharn?...What are you doing here?" Someone asked from behind me.

Then two people came up to me.

One muscular and the other was Ai Type.

Ai Type?

I quickly stood up and hugged him and started crying.

I could feel his hand patting my back awkwardly.

"Ai Tharn are you ok?" Ai Champ asked.

"Why do you want to leave me Ai Type...I love you...Please believe me" I said.

The hand that was patting my shoulder stopped suddenly.

"Hey...I think we should go now" Ai Type said trying to push me away from him.

"NO" I yelled hugging him tighter.

"Ai Tharn calm down" Ai Champ said trying to get me off of Ai Type.

"No...I won't calm down...Don't leave" I said crying.

Then I kissed him.

He pushed me away from him quickly and punched me.

"YOU IDIOT I'M NOT AI TYPE" He yelled angrily.

I started crying harder and felt someone pulling me up to my feet.

Then we started walking to god knows where.

The next day I woke up feeling lightheaded.

Ai Champ was looking at me awkwardly and Ai Gulf was glaring at me.

I sighed and nodded.

"Alright what happened yesterday?" I asked.

"Oh nothing much...Ummm...You just kissed Ai Gulf thinking that he was Ai Type and he punched you" Ai Champ said smiling awkwardly.

Holy Shit.

"I did that?...Ummm...Sorry" I said guiltyly.

Ai Gulf's glare softened and he sighed and nodded.

"Well if I didn't know you better I'd have killed you by now" He said.

"So...Ummm...Mind telling us what happened?" Ai Champ asked.

Then I told them how Ai Type said that he doesn't want to be my burden and that I should find a new person.

They both sighed and nodded then we stayed silent for what felt like hours.

"How is he?" I asked.

"He doesn't trust anyone...He keeps saying that he's a burden on everyone of us and he stopped taking his medicines...Me and Ai Gulf were there because we needed a break...But we didn't think that we will find you there" Ai Champ said.

"Please go see him" Ai Gulf said.

"But what can I do to help?...He said that he doesn't want to continue" I said.

"And you believed it?...Ai Tharn this is a normal reaction" Ai Champ said.

"He was crying and begging me to leave so yeah I guess he meant it" I said.

I looked at Ai Gulf.

"I'm sorry again for what happened yesterday" I said.

"Don't worry" He said.

"Let's go" Ai Champ said.

I sighed and nodded.

I decided to give it one more shot.

Ai Gulf was driving my car since I still felt quite lightheaded.

But then I was drinking coffee which was supposed to help.

We arrived at the hospital a few minutes later and went straight to Ai Type's room.

I heard loud screams coming from inside the room and crying for help.

I opened the door and walked in.

The nurses were trying to pin him down but he was trying to get them off of him.

His eyes were closed and he was crying and screaming and flailing his arms and legs trying to fight the nurses.

"Let him go" I said.

They looked at me confused then after trying to convince them they finally did.

Ai Type immediately stopped his tantrum and grabbed the blanket covering himself with it but he was still crying.

I sat down beside him and put my hand on his shoulder but he flinched from the touch.

"Shhh...Ai Type don't worry...It's me Ai Tharn...I'm sorry...I won't leave" I said in a calm voice.

"No...I...Burden...bad...Useless...I die" He said crying.

I sighed and pulled him up to a sitting position and hugged him.

"No...You're not a burden to anyone Ai Type...You have friends...You have family and you have me...None of us ever thought you were a burden" I said.

"But...It real...Them...Stop...It no hope...You find better...Them forget...I die" He said.

I sighed and shook my head.

"Ai Type please listen to me ok?" I asked.

"No...It better...I burden...Them move on...You too" He said.

"None of us are going to leave you...We never thought of you as a charity case...Do you think that we are this cruel?" I asked.

He stayed silent but was still crying.

I sighed and let go of him then wiped away his tears.

The nurses and the others left a few minutes ago.

"If I thought you were a burden why do you think I'd come back?" I asked.

"Not know" He said shaking his head.

So I kissed him.

And he started kissing back timidly.

I pulled away and smiled at him.

"I'm staying because I want to...I love you...And I'd never leave...Don't worry I'll take care of you" I said.

He sighed and nodded.

I layed him back to the bed gently and gave him his medicines.

And luckily he agreed to take them.

I was happy to know that he was finally trusting me again.