BOOK ONE | dean winchester imagines

4. she was

STORY CREATED BY angelkurenai

Dean didn't know how it happened. He replayed the scene over and over again in his head but no matter how everything was so clear, every move he made and every move the vamps made against all of you, it was all clear but it all got so blurry in his head when you got involved. You, the woman he'd vowed he would love until his last breath on Earth and until the end of time anywhere else. The woman he'd vowed he would give all of his love and heart to, to make you the happiest on Earth. The woman he's vowed he would be a better man for – you would always fight him on that and say he was that and so much more. The woman he'd vowed to protect with his own life. His wife.

And he failed you.

He had taken the burden on him so many times before. Recklessly went ahead alone on hunts to take down the monster to keep you safe, to make sure nothing would happen because he knew he'd just crumble down if something happened to you. You had stubbornly scolded him though.

"Listen to me, Winchester. The moment I put on that wedding ring on my finger and vowed to be by your side through thick and thin, I didn't mean I was going to let your handsome selfless ass get in the way! We became one that day, Dean! So, yes I am coming with you and we will go through this together and if you die... then we'll do that together too."

The determination in your voice as he remembered that moment could almost make him smile but it instantly fluttered when all that could echo in his head was your voice screaming his name in fear and pain.

"Dean!" you cried out, the sound echoing through the tunnels that they had been trying to go through as a shortcut to find Mary and Jack faster, until you got attacked by a large group of bloodthirsty vampires that wanted to make a meal out of all of you. You all knew how dangerous it was to make this move but chose to because you were running out of time.

"(Y/n)!" he roared your name, unable to do anything but watch with wide eyes in utter horror as you were held back by two vamps and one of them took a good chunk out of your neck. The blood oozed out, making you dizzy and despite your initial struggles you went limp in their hands pretty fast; making Dean's blood run cold.

"No!" he roared, but it was broken, as tears formed in his eyes both from anger and pain. He struggled and fought harder than he ever had against the vampires holding him back, his eyes going wide when he saw you get dragged away from him.

"(Y/n/n)!" he yelled, groaning but fighting despite the pain any wounds could cause because honestly there was no bigger pain than the one he felt in his heart at the moment. When he was finally able to kill them, he was ready to run after you until another one jumped on him. He killed both that and another one that got in his way before his body instantly carried him in your direction but he didn't get far away as he collided with a chest. He struggled against Sam but he wouldn't let him.

"Dean, wait! Cas went in-" but Sam's words were cut off as the angel came back.

Dean had not even realized when Cas had ran in your direction but when he emerged from the darkness. His green eyes were frantic and wide as he looked at his friend, waiting by some miracle for you to appear behind him.

"Wha-"

"She's gone." Catiel breathed out but Dean shook his head, feeling his heart break into a thousand pieces in his chest.

"No!" the older Winchester yelled, pushing past his friend and brother but didn't get far away as Castiel took hold of his shoulder and stopped him.

"Dean!" he said but Dean's eyes were focused in the direction you left "We don't have time." he breathed out and Dean finally looked at him, his breathing shaky as his eyes got glossy.

"She- she's my wife!" his voice was rough albeit weak, his strength slipping right through his fingers when the harsh reality set within him.

"We can't save her." Castiel said, his lower lips trembling.

"But-" he started, looking in your direction and all words died in his lips as a painful lump formed in his throat.

"Dean" Sam choked out, placing a hand on his brother shoulder as the only thing the older Winchester did was stare withwide watery eyes and feel himself die all over again on the inside "There was nothing you could have done." the younger Winchester added in a pained voice tone.

"I- I was supposed to." Dean choked out in a gruff voice, a tear rolling down his cheek "I vowed I would protect her with my life. On our wedding day, Sam, I-" a sob cut him off momentarily "I promised to her that I would make her happy, that I'd..." he smiled as your beautiful image in your wedding dress flashed through his eyes.

But this time it hurt. He thought that the memory of you walking down the aisle would be one to warm his heart for years, as many as he had left anyway, that he planned to spend all with you. But now it only seemed to make the hole in his chest even more painful and the coldness around his heart spread all around his numb body.

"She wanted out." Dean smiled despite the tears that ran down his cheeks "But she didn't want entirely out, she knew we couldn't be able to do it. And I- I wanted it too. She'd already found a house and god Sam, it was so beautiful. You'd-you'd have loved it." he sniffled, blinking as he looked up "She already had the nursery in mind."

Castiel and Sam's eyes widened and they shared a look of horror mixing with pain "Dean" Sam started "Was she... Was she pregnant?"

"No" Dean licked his lips, tasting the tears "No, but we wanted to, we were trying to and gosh she was so excited, so happy, Sammy... was..." he scoffed, shaking his head as he gritted his teeth "We lost every chance now." he breathed out in a hoarse voice before turning around and storming off in the direction they were already heading.

"D" Sam barely had the chance to breath out but he knew no words would be able to comfort his brother at the moment. He glanced at Castiel who was looking down at the ground in grief.

"Cas?" the younger Winchester asked with a frown, despite his glossy eyes being able to notice something on the angel's face "What's- what's wrong?"

"Nothing, Sam, it's... nothing." he shook his head but didn't meet his eyes before walking away after Dean, leaving Sam frozen in his place with wide eyes as he realized something Castiel had long ago and oh it downed on him harder than a ton of bricks, a gasp leaving his lips before he whispered one thing...

"She was."