Teenage Bones

Trust

"You said you loved me, Es," Tyler says and I blink at him.

Did I?

"We're dating, I know that it was going to come out eventually but you never even told Hope you loved her- and you definitely did. Do you actually love me?" Tyler's eyes are full of hope and I know they are on my own ones. I know I love Tyler, being there for me every time I've ever needed him until Hope made sure we wouldn't talk anymore. Nodding with a wave of sudden confidence, he kisses me. It's passionate but gentle. A silent promise.

My stomach ruins the moment, growling softly like agreeing with everything that's happening but also demanding blood. Stupid thing.

"Sorry, I've ruined the mood," comes out instead of, 'let me bite you' and I like what I've said more. He smiles, turning his head and offering his neck to me.

"No mood ever is ruined when I'm with you," he says. "Go on, I'm fine with it."

Silently, my teeth slip into the soft skin of his muscular neck, drawing me into the scent of him. His breathing increases and he moans as I gently suck the blood from his neck. I'm being pulled into his lap before I get a say and my legs keep his hips company, caging him to me. Fingertips graze my skin and hushed breathing sounds through the entire room, gasping when I suck too strong and get so much blood- like I'd broken a damn but loving it. I can feel him getting hard below me as warmth gathers at the bottom of my stomach, a wetness building slowly between my thighs. His hips buck up and my mouth falls from his neck which was dripping blood down his shoulder and chest. 

"Sorry," Tyler mutters, kissing up my bare shoulders, jaw and finally my lips, running his hot tongue across my bottom lip. A shive runs it's way down my spine as Tyler holds my waist in his strong arms and holding either side of my ribcage. As carefully as he can, he lays me onto the covers of the bed, looks at me, and kisses my forehead, scraping his thumb against my cheek.

"I love you Esmé and I'm glad you're alive." Leaning down, he captures my lips again, pushing his full erection against my nether regions and driving me insane but leans back to speak again. "Through the last few years with your eating disorder-which, which you luckily recovered from, and now this, I am so fucking lucky you are alive." With one swift movement, my pink thongs are on the floor and he's hands are on my hips, kissing my lower stomach gently. "We can stop at any time, okay?" He says before flicking his tongue over my clit.

This time, it was my turn to buck my hips. The warmth continues to swirl around me as my fingertips tug on the roots of his black hair. Leaning back, his finger circles my entrance, messing with the wetness, watching me squirm.

"Tyler, please-" My voice begs.

"Tell me you love me Esmé." A finger plunges into me and forces a moan. "Say it out loud, Es."

"I don't know if I'm ready," was the wrong thing to say. His hand pushes in and out at a slow, agonizing pace. "Okay, I love you!"

Never had I even seen a guy pull boxers off them as fast as they flew through the air, and within a second, Tyler's erection was pushing all the way in, rewarding me with a filled feeling. Something broke in me and tears fell from my cheeks, confused and enjoying the mix of pain and pleasure.

"Are you okay? Should I stop? What's wrong?" 

I am not a virgin. Tyler and I proved that in the flat before the bombing in the Chinese restaurant, but it felt remarkable like it was the first time I was having sex again.

"No, carry on." His thrusts start slow and I'm thankful. The burn fades slowly so I push back, meeting each of his thrusts with my own until we're both sweating. In the heat of the moment, I bite his shoulder, connecting me to pure pleasure. His moans fill the room with the slapping of skin. His blood exploded my senses, filling my eyes full of stars. 

_*_

"What are you trying to do to me? Kill me!" Mum's shouts only get higher, puncturing my eardrums as she scorns me while I sit in the plush leather sofa, staring up into her unfocused eyes. The sequins of the dress she's wearing reflect the ceiling lights into my eyes, making them twinkle in the most awkward and painful way. One of her hands are clutching the third whine bottle of the night and her other is balled up tight again her side.

"No! Mum, of course not!"  My begging voice no longer obeys me, but the screaming woman in front of me, "I didn't mean to break your cup!"

My sister, Stacy, sits in the corner, the eyes wide and staring at the impossible women with eyes full of fear. I can tell from here that she was in shock, or in another anxiety attack passed from down the line of our family. Stacy was the one to break the cup but knowing how Mum reacts, I owned up before the shouting started.

"Oh, really? Do you want to explain why it's in pieces on the floor then, Esmé!" Mum thrusts the bottle up, gulping from the dark glassed bottle. "How Stacy nearly stepped in it!" She spat towards me. Alcohol was vibrant in her breathe and I fight to not lean back in repulsiveness.

"It was an accident Mum. I promise!"

 Her neck snaps toward me, leaning in so she's an inch from the tip of my nose and spits, "I don't believe in accidents." Mum turns away, staggering in circles around the living space, fingers on her forehead- still carrying the wine bottle. It was weird to her without high heels on."I never should have had children- you're nothing but trouble! Selfish, stupid, clumsy messes! When will the pair of you learn! You're just like your father, a letdown!" As she said 'letdown', she spins, her arms wide in rage. The bottom of the half-full wine bottle smashes into my left eye and making me jerk my head away from her. I even heard my neck click. For a couple of seconds, the room was thrown into silence and a ragged breath comes from Stacy.

"You are ten years old, Esmé. Don't act like you're three with a 'boo-boo'." Gulping the bottle, she drifts to the staircase and charges up to them, bottle stained in a couple of drops of blood. Stacy's shoulders where shaking horrifically when she compelled herself to my side, tipping my face to see her uneven ones. I could see double.

"I'm calling Dad," Stacy said as she ran off to retrieve the landline.

_*_

Tyler's slow rising chest was pressed against my back as he spooned me. It was easy to finish off my dream- it happened. Dad picked Stacy and me up from the house with Liz, who I hadn't met before. They drove me to the hospital and we waited for four painful hours to be told the crack I heard was the side of my bridge broken. When the doctor set my nose again, I screamed really loud, Stacy cried as she held my hand. The doctor put bandages, splints, and pasters around my nose so it would heal right. Liz drove us home with Stacy in the front seat while Dad sat at the back with me, typing the events on his phone- and for being so brave, Liz drove us to Creams and got us all ice cream. At that age, I didn't understand why dad's hands were shaking and his skin flourished in red and why Liz's gaze was always accompanied by a pitiful smile. After that, Stacy chose our Mum over our Dad and she stayed with her while I moved in with Dad. We used to Skype every day but that stopped gradually over half a year until eventually, she blamed me for our lack of contact.

Now, in the warmth of the bed, I sincerely hope both our alive and well. I really, really do.