A series of trash musicals I wrote to fit Escape The Night

More Than Survive

(I'm so sorry for being MIA for so long but I'm back! Enjoy!)

[SAFIYA]
C-c-c c'mon, c-c-c- c'mon
Go, go
C-c-c c'mon, c-c-c- c'mon
Go, go

I'm waiting for my vid to load
My brain is gonna freakin' explode
And now, of course, it's time to hit the road
Which means I'll be uncomfortable all day
But that really isn't such a change
If I'm not feeling weird or super strange
My life would be in utter disarray
'Cause freaking out is my okay
Good morning time to start the day!

C-c-c c'mon, c-c-c c'mon
Go, go
C-c-c c'mon, c-c-c c'mon
Go, go

Should I take a bus or walk instead?
I feel my stomach filling up with dread
When I get nervous my whole face goes red
Dude, weigh the options calmly and be still
A junior on the bus is killer weak
But if I walk when I arrive I'm gonna straight up reek
And my pants will be bunchy and my pits will leak
Ugh, God, I wish I had the skill
To just be fine and cool and chill

I don't wanna be a hero
Just wanna stay in the line
I'll never be your Rob DeNiro
For me Joe Pesci is fine
So I follow my own rules
And I use them as my tools
To stay alive
I don't wanna be special, no, no
I just wanna survive

[COMPANY]
C-c-c c'mon c-c-c c'mon
Go, go
C-c-c c'mon c-c-c c'mon
Go, go

[NIKITA, spoken]
So Joey Graceffa said Gabbie told DeStorm
I'll only have sex with you if you beat me at pool
And then she lost at pool.....
Deliberately

[MANNY, spoken]
That is so awesome

[NIKITA, spoken]
Manny!

[MANNY, spoken]
I mean slutty

[JOEY, spoken]
And then Gabbie was all like-

[NIKITA, spoken]
I'm telling the story, Joey!
Oh my God, he's like totally getting off on that
Ugh

[JESSE,spoken]
Yo, don't touch me, tall ass!

[SAFIYA, spoken]
Sorry, I was just trying to get to-

[JESSE, spoken]
DeStorm P!
So what's the story with Gabbie?

[DESTORM, spoken]
Oh man, I shouldn't say.....
But it's a good thing I rock at pool

[SAFIYA]
I navigate the dangerous hall
Focus on a poster there on the wall
Avoiding any eye contact at all
And trying hard to remain unseen

The poster's closer now, what does it say?
It's a sign-up for the after-school play
It's a sign-up sheet for getting called gay
And that's not what I need right now
End scene
I hang a left and there's

Tyler.....
Tyler.....
Tyler Williams
Tyler......

[TYLER, spoken]
Did you say something?

[SAFIYA, spoken]
I...Uh...Eh!

[SAFIYA]
Well, that was smooth
Yeah, that was super pimp
My Mac Daddy game couldn't be more limp
No time to wallow, no, instead
Just clear your brain and move ahead
Accept that you're one of those girls
Who'll be a virgin 'til she dies

I don't wanna be a baller
Just want some skills to count on
If my boobs were any smaller
They would be totally gone
If I continue at this rate
The only thing I'll ever date
Is my MacBook Pro hard drive
I don't wanna be Clooney, no, no
I just wanna survive

[SAFIYA, spoken]
Matthew!

[MATTHEW]
Safiya, my buddy
How's it hanging?
Lunch is banging
Had my sushi
Got my slushie and more!

The roll was negimaki
And I'm feeling kinda cocky
'Cause the girl at Sev' Elev' gave me a generous pour

[SAFYIA, spoken]
You're listening to Bob Marley again, aren't you?

[MATTHEW]
Oh, I'm listening to Marley
And the groove is hella gnarly
And we're almost at the end of this song

Yeah, that was the end
Now tell me friend
How was class?
You look like ass
What's wrong?

[SAFIYA, spoken]
I wrote Tyler a letter telling him how I feel

[MATTHEW, spoken]
That's progress!

[SAFIYA, spoken]
Yeah, I tore it up and flushed it

[MATTHEW, spoken]
Ugh...

[SAFIYA, spoken]
It's still progress!

[MATTHEW, spoken]
It's all good
Hey, I saw on Discovery
That humanity has stopped evolving!

[SAFIYA, spoken]
That's... good?

[MATTHEW, spoken]
Evolution's "Survival of the Fittest", right?
But now, because of technology
You don't have to be strong to survive!
Which means there's never been a better time in history to be a loser!
Ha! So own it!
Why try to be cool when you could be---

[SAFIYA, spoken]
Signing up for the play!

[MATTHEW, spoken]
I was gonna say playing video games in my basement...

[SAFIYA, spoken]
No! I mean, look who's signing up for the play!

(sung)
Tyler...

[MATTHEW]
Tyler...

[MATTHEW & SAFIYA]
Tyler.....
Tyler.....
Tyler.....
Tyler.....
Tyler Williams
Tyler.....
Tyler......

[COMPANY]
Tyler Williams
Tyler Williams

[SAFIYA]
I feel my body moving through the air
See my converse walking over there
Take a shaky breath and I prepare
Who cares if people think I'm lame
Tyler signed, I'll do the same
I grab the pen, I write my name

[JESSE, spoken]
Gay!

[COMPANY]
(Laughter)

[NIKITA, spoken]
I like gay people

[SAFIYA]
I'm never gonna be the cool girl
I'm more the one who's left out
Of all the characters at school
I am not the one who the story's about
Why can't someone just help me out
And teach me how to thrive

[SAFIYA & COMPANY]
Help me to more than survive!
Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah ah ah...
More than survive!
Na, na, na, na, na na na na...
More than survive!
Na, na, na, na, na na na na...

[SAFIYA]
If this was an apocalypse
I would not need any tips
In how to stay alive

But since the zombie army's yet to descend
And the period is going to end
I'm just trying my best to pass the test and

[SAFIYA & COMPANY]
Survive!
C-c-c-c'mon, c-c-c-c'mon
Go, go!
Survive!
C-c-c-c'mon, c-c-c-c'mon
Go, go!

[COMPANY]
C-c-c-c'mon, c-c-c-c'mon
Go, go!
Go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go
Go... go!