A New Dawn - Transformers Prime (4)

Chapter Twenty-Two

All the voices in my head are coming to life,
They're getting louder and I'm, I'm terrified,
How do you run from your own mind?
Is this what I've become?

...

I tried to find my reflection on the glass,
But all I ever saw were the things I lack,
All the smudges on the mirror made me go insane,
All I ever thought I was,
Was a mistake.

[Amanda]

  And just like that, the control was out of my hands.

  I hated it.

  I sat on the couch at the base while Miko, Jack, and Finn tended to each other's wounds. I had shaken them all off, knowing that I wasn't hurt badly anywhere, and instead focused on how easily I'd gone from leader to being brushed under the rug. A bitter taste coated my tongue, and I sat there, silently fuming.

  "It would seem that Tempest is after the same goal as Megatron then," Ultra Magnus concluded after Ratchet finished relaying all of our intel to him. I glared at the medic, whose back was to me.

  Oh, he must be so happy now that the matter is out of the hands of this inexperienced, childish, good for nothing-

  Slight pain shot up my jaw, and I loosened it, working it around to ease the stiffness from my own tension and the hard hit Tempest had landed.

  "But she'll put up a different kind of fight," Arcee spoke up. "She's got Valilorna on her side, after all."

  "It's like the war all over again," Bulkhead sighed.

  "Not really, Bulk," Miko said. "I mean, the war on Cybertron didn't have us kicking evil butt."

  Bulkhead shook his head. "Whose idea was it in the first place to let the kids go into battle?"

  That was the first time Ratchet looked towards me, making my anger spike. Right, now you want me to talk, because of course, when something wrong happened, it was my fault. How could I imagine otherwise?

  I took a deep breath, calming myself enough to prevent an outburst. "Mine. We handled the human sized Cybertronians because we were the only ones who could. The military is inexperienced, you lot are too big. We're the ones in the middle, so we dealt with it." My tone left no room for argument.

  Ultra Magnus' mouth twitched downwards. "Yet there are still Cybertronians of usual height fighting for Tempest."

  "Well, we didn't know that until a couple days ago," It took everything for me not to snap my words. "We had to wait for military clearance before calling you in. Rogue Cybertronians may be a matter for you guys, but we still have to follow the military's rules or we'll be shut down for good."

  He didn't move for a long moment, before he nodded curtly. "We will handle the situation from here, then. Amanda, your abilities may be required to counter Tempest's enlistment of Valilorna, but I do not advise anymore field missions otherwise."

  "Excuse me?" My pitch was high with disbelief and I stood abruptly. "Did you not hear the whole part I said about us being the only ones who can handle Tempest's human sized minions?"

  "If the entire force was human sized, then I would not have given the order, but that is not the case."

  Rage crossed my vision. He thought of me as nothing but a weapon to use against Valilorna? Didn't I prove to be a fighter? I had, multiple times! Why do they still see me as a pest in the way?!