Untangle Me Free

Preface

"How's school, Alicia?"

I'm walking at our school grounds with my phone on my ear, talking to my dad. Nauna na akong umalis kay Maggie dahil may practice siya sa volleyball at siguradong gagabihin sila sa training. I am not as athletic as her kaya hindi ko na binalak pang sumali o manood man lang ng game niya. I also miss my bed because I pulled an all-nighter so I badly need my sleep. 

"It's fine, Dad. We just had our exams and we're left for one more set before this academic year ends." 

I sat on the bench near the college area but it's still quite far from our building. Next academic year hopefully diyan na ako at mas marami na akong makakasalamuha. I'm quite excited and nervous kasi I'm still torn between engineering and nursing. I want both but I think I'll have to choose soon since I'm left with just a month or so here before I enroll as a college freshman.

"You're about to graduate high school, hija. Have you thought of a school yet? Don't you have a final decision in mind?" 

I noticed Kuya Migo sa may college building with his friends and he waved at me, I waved back in return and smiled.  I sighed. Yumuko ako at nilaro nalang ang damo sa may paanan ko.

"Dad, I think I'll stay here. I haven't thought of my course yet but I want to study here."

My dad paused for a while and sighed. I still want to stay here, I know that he wants me to study sa Manila since mas marami ang offer doon. I even took entrance exams sa mga schools na gusto niya for me para kahit papaano ay mapagbigyan ko siya at hindi niya ma feel na I'm shutting his opinions out. 

"Are you sure? I have one of your entrance exam results and it says here that you passed, please consider your options here, hija."

I nodded kahit na alam kong he won't see it. I don't want to hurt my dad sa pipiliin ko but I really want to stay here. I feel safe and comfortable here, I know people and people know me. I don't want to live in a strange land and be with no one but myself. I may sound so selfish and so unready for change but this is what I want and one of these days I will make Dad understand.

"Okay, Dad. I'll go now, I'll call you when I have the time again or call me when you do."

He's staying in Manila for the reason that his work is there. He comes home once in a while or we sometimes go there when we have the time. We stay here because Mom works here and our land where she works is here also. I feel bad about my Dad, I know that he only wants what's best for me but I don't want to leave Mom here, and Jiro is still so young. I think Dad will understand.

Ngayon naman ay ayaw ko ng umuwi dahil siguradong hindi na ako makakatulog sa kakaisip at mababagot ako doon panigurado. Hindi ko na iniinda ngayon ang antok kahit pa wala akong halos tulog. Iniisip ko nanaman kung saan ako mag aaral at ano ba ang dapat kong gawin. Kahit ang kurso ay hindi ko pa mapili. 

Inis na inis kong sinipa ang bato sa tapat ko pati na rin ang iba pang nandoon. Sa bawat sipa ko ng bato ay katumbas ng kurso na gusto ko, naisip ko na kung san matigil ang kurso hanggang maubos ang bato ay bibigyan ko ng chance yon. 

Engineering?

Nursing?

Ang huling bato ay Engineering, napangiti ako at pumalakpak pa sa kinauupuan dahil sa saya na may napili na akong kurso. I know, it is a stupid way but it's just the same in tossing a coin since yun ang unang balak ko kanina.

Pwede ko ng masamahan si Maggie dahil Engineering din nga pala ang kukunin niya, mas lalo akong natuwa dahil may kaibigan na agad ako doon. I know hindi ko naman problema ang pakikipagkaibigan pero mas maganda pa rin na may kasama na ako agad.