'if you were stranded on a desert island, and you could have one thing with you, what would it be?'
From a young age i always thought that was a dumb question. Some people would say, 'isn't it obvious? A boat.'
But what if you didn't know how to row a boat? If it came down to survival, I guess you'd have to teach yourself.
Others would say resources to survive off of. Instead of going back home, you'd choose to stay there, and colonise this island. Make it yours. Have things done, your way.
Then there are those people obsessed with love. They'd claim to want a specific person there. Because love is all they need. Just their significant other.
I don't have anything against love. I think it's great. I would like to have someone care about me like they do. I just don't really think I need love, to survive.
Technically, you don't have to be in love to have a child with someone. So if it came down to survival, and if you had to repopulate, you wouldn't have to love them.
Relationships seem controlling. They're too scared to say the wrong thing, they get nervous to meet each other's families. I don't get why. So what if some average joe's dad doesn't like you. If you're in love, family shouldn't stop that.
So why should you care what his parents think? Why should you even care what he thinks? If he loved you back, he wouldn't get offended if you say the wrong thing. He would understand. He wouldn't just end your relationship, at the click of his fingers.
He wouldn't take you on the island. He would be the sort of person to escape. Because he's scared. Scared of being alone. He likes to be in control. He makes you feel bad when he's the one that overreacted. He wouldn't be able to repopulate by his self. He simply wouldn't be able to.
He can't do anything by his self. That's why he has you. You do the everything for him. He treats you like his property. Like an object.
I'm not saying all relationships are like this. A lot are truly based on love, and will always be. I'm not saying that. I'm saying that sometimes, relationships aren't what they seem.
If I were to get into a relationship with somebody, right now, I wouldn't let them tell me what to do. I'd have boundaries, sure. I wouldn't be walking on eggshells around them. I wouldn't say 'He's been ignoring me, but I'm not gonna call him out on it because I'll only make things worse'. Because do you know what that means?
It means he's won. He's took control. He now practically owns you. You do whatever he wants you to, you say what he wants you to. If you know he won't like something, you don't do it.
Sure, he can be sweet. Nobody else can see that, am I right? Nobody else sees that he's kind, and gentle. I'm sure he's a great guy.
But have you ever noticed that there are topics that you avoid? When you're around him. Certain things that you won't say, because it will upset him, and he might break up with you.
I'm sure you love him. So so much. I think that's great. I'm happy for you. So happy. Just try this, for me. Try not avoiding those topics. If he breaks a promise, call him out. Tell him, 'you promised'. Don't let him get away with it. If he's ignoring you, ask him, 'why are you ignoring me?'
Don't immediately think that you've done something. Because chances are, you haven't. You're becoming independent, and some people just don't like that
-Izzy, 22/3/20
