Gage Cilleti has just begun his junior year of high school, and is becoming more and more involved in his school's activities, considering he'd been playing baseball since he was just seven-years-old.
Elijah McCay has just dropped out of school, du...
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The entire night has been wonderful. I watch Elijah take bites of bits and pieces of his meal, and every so often, my lips curl into a genuine smile. I finish before him, and he sits back, beginning to scroll through his cellphone. My stomach still grumbles, most likely from only eating one meal today—which is dinner.
He types away absentmindedly, then finally meets my gaze. My cheeks immediately heat, as he leans in a bit closer.
"What?" He's asking why I'm staring at him, and I clear my throat, trying to stand up from my side of the booth.
"I-I think I have to pee, I'll be right back—"
He interrupts before I can get the words out, "you just went like twenty minutes ago," he laughs.
"Y-Yeah, I know, it's all the diet coke." I send him a crooked smile, as he just directs his attention back onto the small device in his hands.
As I make my way over to the restrooms located in the back of the diner, my cellphone is already out and I'm dialing Rick's number. I'm too preoccupied with my walk to the back that I don't even realize that Rick doesn't pick up, me leaving an accidental, empty voicemail.
I shut a stall door behind me, practically crouching down into the tiny-tiny speaker inside of my cellphone. "Shit."
When it finally sinks in that Rick is not going to answer, I use my foot to flush to empty toilet beside me, so that anyone in the restroom isn't suspicious.
Just in case, I call one more time, praying quietly beneath my breath. And just when I swing open the stall, there stands Terrance, a knowing smirk placed on his full lips that I once—
"Small world, huh?"
I can't help but roll my eyes, tucking my phone into the back pocket of my jeans. He leans his head against the brick wall, taking a small, yet heavy deep breath.
When I don't answer, he takes a step toward me, watching as the last resident of the restroom, besides him and I—leaves. Then, he turns the lock on the knob, and takes another deep breath in. Then out, again.
"You can't ignore me forever, Gage."
I finally meet his gaze in the mirror right above the sink, leaning both hands on the marble countertops to recollect my thoughts. "I'm not ignoring you, Terrance—"
"Oh, bullshit. We haven't talked in weeks. Even after the entire summer ordeal, and what I said at the party. Which I know was a douche move, and I apologize—sincerely." He ends his sentence with a gruff sigh.
I don't know how to respond, considering all I want to do is go out into the diner, and continue my night with Elijah, not just stand here and go down memory lane with Terrance.
"Where are you going with this?"
He gets a bit closer, "what I'm saying is," he's even closer now. "I miss you."
I don't believe him. Not even for a second, but there's something about hearing those words out of someone's mouth. And being directed at me, that makes me want to believe him. But I know that I can't. Especially after realizing I still have a kiddie crush on Elijah.
Last year, I was young naive. Not that I'm no longer young and naive—just not when it comes to Terrance. Not anymore.
He's saying he misses me because he knows. He knows I've moved on. He doesn't know or understand why yet. But he just knows. And he's afraid that I won't be here when he's lonely or bored to play with, anymore. And I almost smile at this fact.
I place both hands on Terrances shoulders, and push backwards a bit, so that there's a comfortable amount of space between us. "Look, Terrance. We don't have feelings for each other—at least not anymore. You can stop pretending now." I laugh at the last bit of my words.
He laughs too, and his eyes meet mine once more. "I was never pretending, G."
And with that, he left the restroom, and I was alone.
A few minutes later, I made my way out of the restroom, and back to Elijah, who was still sitting soundly at our table, our dishes cleared from it. I smile, making my way over to him.
When I slide back into my booth, he raises an eyebrow, and I can feel my heartbeat accelerate again. Just by being eye-to-eye with him.
"Stomach troubles?"
It's nearing 4am when Elijah pulls into my driveway, and puts his cars in park. I pull at the lock on the passenger side, but pause. I look over at Elijah, with a content look on my face. And I can only imagine how much of a goof I must seem like right about now.
He sends me a confused look, waiting for me to speak my mind. "What's up?"
"Thank you," I whisper, although I don't even remember why I'm speaking at such a low tone. Maybe it's because of the soft music that's coming from his stereo, or the gravitational pull I'm feeling from his bright, green eyes.
I want to know what he sees when he looks at me. I don't understand why I feel such a pull to Elijah, considering we've only had a handful of conversations. If I was just a bit brave—and older, I'd lean in right then and there.
But God knew the consequences that came with a gay guy making a move on a straight guy.
"You're welcome," he finally says, his Adam's apple bobbing in his throat.
The next thing I know, he's clicking the unlock button on the drivers side door, avoiding my obvious eye contact.
I take the hint, and slide out of his car, watching as it drives far off into the night.
I use my key to open my front door, careful not to alert Toro in his state of restlessness. Once I'm back into my bedroom, I let out a content sigh, and slump down my wall. My cheeks are hot, and I cannot for the life of me—stop smiling.
I want to share this moment with someone, while also wanting to keep it between Elijah and I. And I wonder what he would do, if he were in my shoes.
