🌻 sunflower 🌻// reddie au

🌻 .. | 0 2 | .. 🌻

edward kaspbrak was always moving to new a new place. he wouldn't be surprised if he and his mother didn't stay in derry for long. eddie had already estimated that they would live in that small town for about 3-7 months, and then they'd most likely move again.

he barely even had the chance to make friends, even less met anyone in their old towns. though he of course would try his hardest at putting as much effort as he could into befriending the other teenagers.

it was prettier than most placed he had seen-- derry was --he didn't think he'd mind staying there for a while. he definitely hoped that his estimate was completely off-course and that eddie could attend high school there.

maybe he convince his mother to give him permission to stay. he knew it was a long-shot though. his mother was never the type to understand anyone else, or even to give as little as a fuck about you or your desires.

just maybe though, just maybe, he could manipulate his mother. it would be just this once, and even though he may feel bad about it for the rest of his life, he would be able to feel happiness. he tells himself this every time they appear in a new town, and yet he does nothing at all to stop the moving.

maybe he just feels comfort in the desperation. maybe he it makes him feel natural to crave something he knows he cannot have. maybe that's the reason he refused to stand up to his mother.

in this moment, edward was sitting in the car, watching the world fly by from the window. occasionally, he would see it stop due to the need of fuel.

he wish he could have stopped it forever. it scared him how it was going by so quickly, and he wanted to slow everything down, just so he was at least given then chance to catch a breath or two.

eddie suddenly held tightly onto his white backpack strands, he didn't know exactly why he did, he just did. he was throwing his best bet at the theory that they had lived in the town that was slowly passing them now.

"oh look! little baby has a fanny pack!"

"C'mon, just try it. it doesn't matter if it triggers your asthma, we are all going to die one day anyways."

"you look like a faggot. you should really try at something else if you want people to actually like you here."

eddie gasped for air in the backseat, his hands digging to pull out his collapsing lungs. the ships were sinking and captain k had no sense in his brain allowing him to think nor do anything. his boat just sat in the stormy waters, sloshing with the treacherous waves, threatening to crash amongst the rocks in the surrounding areas.

"are you okay back there eddie bear?"

the sweet voice of his mother filled up his mind, and it flowed through his system and released out of his nose.

he shakily looked up to see sonia kaspbrak turned around in front of him. she looked so, worried. he felt his heart sweet with love and care for the older woman. eddie hated to see her care so much about the little boy.

"yeah, i'm okay mommy." he shared with her an uneasy smile. he then reached his hand out to softly touch his mother's. "it's okay, i promise."

sonia sighed, she hesitantly pulled away and got out of the stopped car. her tender hand had left his, and now his was alone. it was cold where the warm hand once was, and he wondered what he would do if that coldness would have stayed there forever.

eddie shook his head of the anxiety-filled thoughts, and he opened his fanny pack to reveal the whole pharmacy he carried with him. eddie sighed at the unorganized materials and fumbled through the waist pack to grasp his aspirator.

he attempted a deep breath in and out, but he could do nothing but wheeze. he stuck the inhaler in his mouth and pulled the trigger. his airways cooled down as the medicine followed through them.

eddie held onto the car seats ahead of him with a tugging, splitting pain that only an organism could feel. he let his shaky breaths flow with the cool breeze that passed through his mother's open window. he stayed in this position for what felt like an hour, inhaler still in hand.

he sighed again and thought to himself fearfully,
this is not going to be fun... is it?

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a/n :

3 / 23 / 2020
               783 words