The Androgynous

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All eyes now to the woman standing at the farthest right. “Gay marriage is now legal in Great Britain,” begins The Androgynous. 

Everyone, including the bodyguards, gives a round of applause. 

“Well that’s good news from my dear Elizabeth,” says The King who has just broken his silence.

“However, we cannot deny that in some other member countries of the Commonwealth, homosexuality is still taboo and is punishable by law. Eleven countries in Africa punish homosexual acts by imprisonment. Mauritius as an exception punishes only the male. But it doesn’t sound any better. In Brunei…this is cruel but homosexuality is still punishable by death.”

“Britain approving gay marriage is one big leap to achieving our goal,” The Builder comments. Despite his virile appearance, he’s actually a feminist which explains having a female bodyguard with him. “I believe in the Commonwealth. The recently concluded Commonwealth Games…of which the Chairman, The Androgynous, and I, manipulated from the shadows has garnered a lot of respect for LGBT rights. We can only hope that this will cause a domino effect to the rest.”

“Thank you, Brother Builder. To continue…I bet everyone has seen the video of Ms. Emma Watson’s speech to the UN being the Ambassadress for Women’s Rights.”

“I've seen it in YouTube.”

“My goodness…that was a powerful speech.”

“The Potter star has grown. How old is she now?”

“Silence please,” His Supremacy orders. The growing murmurs die in an instant. “You may continue Androgynous.”

“As I was saying, she had this speech in front of the United Nations officials. It was indeed a powerful speech as evidenced by its getting viral in the internet. However, it didn't please some people. Surprisingly, some people find it as an aggressive feminist speech.”

“I don’t think it was aggressive,” replies The Builder. “Well, she had a point there…that feminism is now criticised by some as a negative approach to gender equality.”

“Exactly,” supports The Linguist. “And Ms. Watson wanted to clarify that fact. But I am not so sure. Maybe…maybe these people who stereotype feminists as aggressive activists…maybe they experienced…uhm…how do I say this…maybe they experienced something different?”

“I get your point, Linguist,” answers The King. “A couple of months ago, I saw this advertisement in the internet about a man bullied by his girlfriend. Everything was captured by a hidden camera. How the girlfriend shouted at him in public. He was kicked in the crotch and was slapped like about ten times. And the overall statement: ‘Men get abused too.’ It was supported by a research stating that 43% of men are being abused by women. Imagine that?”

The Androgynous then continues to conclude her statements. “Has feminism gone way beyond its true purpose? If it is, then, shall we give in…in favour of male chauvinism? Brothers and sisters, gender equality is indeed one of the biggest pillars to accomplish our One True Mission. I beg you to agree with me but this is as challenging as uniting all the races in the world. Mankind will not be whole when there’s inequality amongst genders and gender preferences. Your Supremacy, everyone, I have spoken.”

The King raises his hand when The Androgynous is in her chair. “Your Supremacy, may I be allowed to speak first?”

“Of course, brother.”

“May I suggest increasing our funds for the Ultimate Belief Division?” The King speaks confidently as if expecting everyone to agree with him. “If it’s true, as mentioned by Androgynous, that we are having a problem with our homosexual brothers and sisters not being globally accepted by humanity, then 101%...I want to denounce all kinds of religion in the world. Mankind, all of us, should not believe in a god who punishes a creature who had no choice but to accept the fate woven by that god himself.”

“I second the motion.”

“I am definitely on the same boat.”

This time, His Supremacy signals to speak. “You said what I wanted to say, my brother King. But let me expound that. Time has changed but the Holy Scriptures indeed say the same. The books must all be destroyed to twist the minds of men. For many years The Legacy, all the Chairmen before me, have been convincing the Vatican to revise the teachings. But they said that the Word of God is absolute and subtle.

“However, according to the updated Catechism of the Catholic Church…the homosexual act and not the homosexual person should be condemned. As the traditional passage goes, love the sinner, hate the sin. Homosexuals should be accepted with respect, compassion, and sensitivity – that’s what the Catechism says. LGBT has been misunderstood by people all over the world because of prejudice. Everyone’s mind is clouded by culture and the law of nature.

“According again to the Catechism...quote unquote, ‘They do not choose their homosexual condition; for most of them it is a trial.’ A sexual act by an unmarried couple is as sinful as any homosexual act.”

“Amen to that,” says The Androgynous.

“So that’s one way to solve our problem with gender equality,” continues His Supremacy. “We need to support the Ultimate Belief Division for when time comes…not even this Catholic Catechism will matter anymore or any of those sacred texts that condemn relationships of the same sex.

“Perhaps, all of you are aware that one of my bodyguards here in the room…is my boyfriend.”

None of the attendees reacts with what His Supremacy just confessed. All of the heads know about it already except for The King. Deep inside, the head of the World Domination Division is surprised. Not because of the fact that the current Chairman of The Legacy is a homosexual but because His Supremacy never told him personally. Nevertheless, if it doesn't matter, why give a reaction?

“Well, to be precise, LG629-I, is my eromenos. I met him in Sicily when he was 14 years old.” His Supremacy turns his head to the right referring to the bodyguard behind him. The bodyguard maintains his composure. “I had his consent of course…as well as his parents. We are practising this ancient Athenian custom of pederasty wherein each of us is benefited by love and love alone.

“You see…culture…tradition…religion…they’re contradicting. This relationship I have with LG629-I is illegal to most laws of man these days. But back in time…back in ancient Greece…it was considered as the greatest form of love.”

“Your Supremacy, what plans do we have for the unrest of feminists versus male chauvinists?” The Androgynous asks…just in case everyone thinks homosexuality is the only concern of her division.

“We will support the recently launched #HeForShe Movement. I have allocated some funds which we will give via our brothers and sisters in the UN. These days, we cannot tell who truly fights for being abused. However, we will consider this issue of male abuse as a growing concern with gender equality. That advertisement seen by The King is definitely an eye opener.”

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