Her Bedtime

Bedtime

It was already 3 A.M at that time when I asked my sister to go to sleep. "Hey, isn't it time for you to sleep already?" I asked my sister in an annoyed manner. The way she headed to bed, I knew she was annoyed, I know she didn't like that, but I didn't care. I just really wanted to talk to my boyfriend.

A few moments later, she turned off her gadgets and slept under the covers. I then messaged my boyfriend that he can call now that my sister's already asleep.

He called me.

"What took you so long?" He asked, he was already waiting for me impatiently. I then giggled at his tone and teased him, "Why aren't you still used to this yeeeeet~?" I knew he wasn't annoyed anymore after I said those words in the sweet tone of my voice.

We talked all night with each other, spent every bit of our precious time just to make each other happy. His sweet words always touched my heart, I felt happy and complete.

The next morning, I woke up before my sister did, which was pretty unusual since I know she always wakes up earlier than I do. Maybe, it was because she slept at 3 A.M last night, but even if that was the reason, she was supposed to wake up earlier since she did sleep earlier than I did.

I got up from my bed and went downstairs to have breakfast.

I saw my mother sobbing.

I had no idea why she was sobbing though, but I tried to comfort her. I gave her a really tight hug. She calmed down a bit and tried to speak whatever's on her mind... I felt uneasy, I knew something was completely wrong that could affect me as well.

"Your sister..." my mom finally spoke out the words she was trying to say, but after I heard those words, my heart suddenly shattered into pieces. I knew something was wrong, I knew something went wrong. "...she's gone." she continued. I felt my heart skipped a beat.

I messed up. I made a huge mistake, I never should have asked her to go to bed. She was already on her deathbed... I didn't know. She didn't look really weak that night, she didn't look exhausted.

How the hell did this happen? Why... why didn't she tell anyone that she was already giving up?

"MOM, MOM, you're LYING, AREN'T YOU?" I screamed, I was scared, shocked, frustrated, I don't know what to feel. "Why?" is the only question running through my mind. I shook her body, and kept on crying. "Tell me you're lying... please..." I begged and begged and begged for her to tell me that she was lying even though I knew she wasn't.

"Do I look like I'm LYING?!" She slapped me on the face. I didn't feel anything at first, but then it stung my face... It slowly started to hurt. I caressed my cheek as tears started flowing more on my face. I was shocked. My mother left the kitchen and headed upstairs.

I dropped on my knees and remembered that my sister's leukemia was already severe. My heart shattered into pieces.

I lost my best friend, I lost my sister, I lost my other half. I lost her... I lost my sister because of my stupidity and insensitivity...

I don't know what I'm supposed to do. I'm lost. I'm the reason why I lost my sister. I chose to hang out with someone who'll let go of me, rather than spend my last moments with my sister.

I took a breath and wiped my tears. I knew my sister wouldn't like it if I don't stay strong for her. I know she wants me to stay strong for her.

It'll be a long way for me to recover about her loss, but I'll do my very best for her.

Sis, I love you.