Nini POV
About two weeks have passed since mine and Ricky's trip to Salt Lake. Things were going pretty well and it was a beautiful Saturday in Los Angeles. "Hey babe, how about a trip to the beach?" I hear Ricky yell from our living room. "Sure!" I yell back and he comes in from the other room to kiss me. "Awesome" he says and he leads the way to the bedroom to grab our swimsuits. I follow, putting mine on in the bedroom while he heads to the bathroom. As I fasten everything, I catch my reflection in the mirror. "Nins how many towels do you want?" Ricky asks from the bathroom. I'm too distracted to answer though, as I look myself over in my bathing suit. I was getting larger to say the least. I hadn't noticed it because I had been wearing mostly sweats or big dresses, but at 10 weeks pregnant in this bathing suit, I look ridiculous. My stomach looks swollen and if no one knew I was pregnant, they'd guess I just overeat. I place my hand on my stomach and turn to the side. There's never been a time in my life where I haven't worked hard for my body and that's always been evident in my appearance. Right now I just feel weird. Something that I should be proud of and excited about was making me feel so insecure which I hated. "Nini?" Ricky says, his voice getting louder signaling to me that he was coming out of the bathroom. I look around and throw on my cover up as quickly as I can. Ricky has pulled up my shirt from time to time to see my growing bump, but he hasn't seen me completely exposed yet and part of me is a little worried he won't find me attractive anymore. I'm in this body and I'm finding it hard to find me attractive. Ricky walks into the room and looks at me weirdly. "You good?" He asks with a smile, coming over to grab my hands. "Uh yeah, totally." I tell him. He flashes another confused smile but nods. "Okay, I was going to ask how many towels you wanted?" I shake my head. "Oh just two is fine." He nods, sort of unsure, and kisses my cheek. "Alright, you ready to go?" I meet his eyes and look away quickly. "Oh well actually, I was thinking, how about we just stay home and do a movie day? It's been a while since we've done that? Or we can go to Santa Monica Pier?" Ricky walks back over to me slowly, grabbing my hands and dipping his head to meet my eyes. "Nini, what's up?" He asks and I laugh. "What do you mean?" I say and he smiles. "Well those are two very different activities. If you're not up for the beach that's totally fine but I wouldn't expect you to be able to do the pier." I mentally slap myself in the head. "Oh well, you know." I say gesturing around the room wildly and he laughs, taking my hands and leading me over to the bed. "What's really going on?" He asks, tipping my chin up so that I can meet his eyes. "I just..." he nods for me to go on and rubs my back. "I just look a little weird right now." His eyes flash with confusion. "Weird? What do you mean baby?" He asks, pulling me a little closer to his side on the bed. "Well it's just that we haven't... so you haven't... and I barely even like" he chuckles and squeezes my hand. "Sentences" he says and he rubs my back. "I just look weird." I say, not knowing how to elaborate. I gesture to my stomach. "I'm... changing and I don't like it." I say and he looks down at my stomach and then meets my eyes. "Of course you're changing baby, you have a human in there and I know you've never been one for change, so this must be unbelievably difficult but love, you're so gorgeous." I look at him with uncertainty in my eyes and his grasp tightens on my hand. "What are you worried about?" He asks and he waits for my answer patiently. "Well you and what other people will see." Ricky shakes his head and his hands rest at the base of my neck. "You are doing the hardest job in the world right now. And you're still fucking stunning. I know the insecurity must be through the roof right now, but if you're worried about me not thinking you're gorgeous, you shouldn't. You will always be the most beautiful woman in the world to me." I blush at his words and one of his hands rests on my warm cheek. "You sweet girl. Don't ever doubt yourself about this." I nod and turn my head into his hand and he smiles. "Plus, you're contributing to society and all." I laugh and lean into him. "True!" I say and he smiles at my genuine smile. "Now, lemme see how beautiful you are." He says and reaches for the hem of my coverup. "Woah wait what?" I ask and he pulls his hands back. "I know you babe, you'll probably just keep this on at the beach." I laugh and lean my head on his shoulder. His hand runs over my arm. "We'll work on it" he says softly and he pulls my body into a hug. When we pull back, he lifts my shirt lightly and gets off the bed to kneel in front of my stomach. I thread my fingertips through his hair as he kisses my stomach. "You better be worth it. You're already worrying your mom." He mumbles against my skin and I laugh. "It's all scary" I say honestly and he looks up at me from the floor. "It really is babe, but doing it with you is a whole lot less scary, and I'm determined to make sure it's the same for you." I smile down at him and he returns to kissing my stomach lightly.
