Oh, man, I've been waiting to type this one down for . . . since it was created. This should be fun.
My parents' favorite topic for half-hour to hour long lectures: time wasting.
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"Why didn't you do it right the first time? You could've been done by now . . . "
A half-hour later, and I've very clearly been slowly moving toward the door, to signal that I understand, and want to get the chores done already this whole time.
"So we just want you to know that it's important not to waste time."
YES, I think. MOM'S DONE!
Then Dad cuts in.
"You know, if you'd just done it right the first time, you would have been done by now . . . "
Three times over, I add silently.
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So that's how it goes on . . . and on . . . and then I think it's over, only to have my hopes crushed like a grape because I didn't flee fast enough. (Yes, SaydiSpencer, that was a Tangled reference.)
Then there's the whole "You can tell us anything lecture", which is oftentimes riddled with silent comments about Unless I tell you . . . . fill in the blank.
Examples:
Unless I tell you how I really feel about these time-wasting lectures about time-wasting.
Unless I tell you that I really do understand without the extra twenty to fifty minutes of lecture.
Unless I tell you that I'm really just saying that because I'm pretty sure that that's what you want to hear.
Unless I tell you that my feet are getting sore from standing up for the whole lecture.
Etcetera.
Disclaimer: I do love my parents. (Who else could say that their parents are the best parents in the universe?) This is just about the only possible thing I could criticize them on.
