caged // ambrollins

a way

dean's pov

hehe, he loves me. i know he does.

he wouldn't have told me yes if he wasn't. i shook the thought, that scumbag? nah. never. i can't love him. i shouldn't. but--

christ, he's writing in his journal again. why does he have to write about me? i hate it when he does that.

he keeps looking at me- 

i turned myself around so he can't see my face. i lowered my head, but i couldn't keep looking at him. i often turn my head around to look at him, '' what the hell are you writing about in there? about how handsome i am? " i choked it out, what the fuck am i saying.

i ignored most of the things he said and just turned myself back around. i needed to talk to roman. we needed to get a good look around the facility, cause i know damn well they're hiding some things from us. they keep us on leashes and collars, so it's impossible for us to get around when they've got all eyes on us every damn second of the day 24/7.

it's mission impossible, but not like i have anything else to fucking do.

i hear the loud buzzer in the speaker  as i hear the rusty doors scraping on the floors; they were opening.

what now? i don't really feel like going out.

i felt the leather press onto my neck as the collar tightened. i didn't even bother putting up a fight this time because i know they won't let me out, let alone will it do even anything but make me stricken, and their security will only increase on me. not like it would do much to help my case of escaping. nor would it help roman's. but now that i have an ally on the facility team, i have a chance.

he has all access to the areas. maybe if i ask him. but not now.

as we're walking, i could tell the collar wasn't on me as tight as it had been last time. at least i won't have a permanent addition to my neck now. he's going easy on me.

ellsworth and wyatt pass me. that damn wyatt guy. 

he seemed pretty innocent at first, a children's television host. but he was a masked serial killer in disguise. till they caught that bastard.  

they released us into a yard, but there were some barriers separating us from the others. it was just a little area with some things in there, a piece of paper and a pencil, maybe a couple crayons. we were outside, but i knew i couldn't get out.

i look back at rollins, " what the fuck is this. "

he looks at me, his damn expression hasn't changed much, '' we thought it would be nice for you to get out a bit. "

'' get out a bit? this is just a cell but outdoors. and what the hell is this? i'm a 32 year old man, i'm not in preschool. '' i looked at the supplies given to me, laying on the floor.

'' i know, but it's what they're trying, maybe so you won't be mentally stuck in your cell. ''

i would open my mouth to respond, but i don't bother. i sit down and pick up a pencil, i feel like i fucking idiot.

as i wrote something down, i folded it up and passed it to seth.

he took it promptly and read it. " very mature, ambrose. because a note with the word ' fuck you ' definitely proves your point of not being in preschool again. ''

'' shut the fuck up, idiot. flip it over. ''

he did.

if we're going to get out of here, you will need to give me access to some places. i need to know my way around this place if we have any chance. roman too. you're the only person of us two who would know their way around this hellhole.

seth looked somewhat dumbfounded, '' for being in here for decades, you have very profound use of language, and how did you write this in that second of-- "

i put my finger to my lips, '' be quiet, fucker, and it doesn't matter. i'm smarter than you think. just because i've been here for a long time doesn't mean i've lost touch with how to live. ''

he folded the note again and put it in his pocket. 

i need a way to contact roman. if i can figure out where he is out here.