I Don't Think It Was Love At First Sight

Chapter 13 - Rohan

"So how are you?" She looked at me as if i had just asked her to marry me. " Okay so I can't be nice to you?" And she answered to my question as "you can be but why this sudden change of heart?" So i had to explain and i also know that we have to talk about yesterday too i just don't know how. "Where is Riya?" She asked me. " So... Yesterday she cried a lot, but then she calmed. Later we talked a little because all the memories of Ananya also came back" she intervened me " okay so i really need to know who this Ananya is now" and i just shrugged her off because talking about Ananya would again bring me all the memories back and then i would be furious again. "Then we decided that it's for the best that she went to our parents for a while. So today morning she left for India. So for a few days its just us.." she didn't say anything but her morning face was so adorable and i jus couldn't resist and I kissed her. She kissed me back. We then again just sunk into the passion like yesterday night. I couldn't control anymore. She pulled back and said, "I really am not the girls you normally sleep with. I can't be that. I can't" and she stood up but i held her hand and stopped her. Did she really think she was one of those? She is so different i can never think of her like that. Also for a fact i know that i am her first kiss and i can't stop my smile now. I said, "You are not even close to them Sania. You are so much more different and so much ... Deep. You have no idea how am i controlling myself from you since these days. And especially the last 3 to 4 days, you turn me crazy. I always knew I can't ever have a just anything physical with you. And so i controlled myself. But I don't want to anymore. We have some kind of heat and I know you feel it too." She turned towards me came close them cupped my face and looked at me with those eyes, her eyes are just magical. But then she looked down and took a step backwards and said," but what about your other needs? And what about all the emotions? And you said you want something deep but you don't even tell me who Ananya is. I don't know who you are deep down. And i am a simple girl, i really want to focus on my dreams. This ..this can't happen. I can't let my heart broken." I was shattered. Why did she think I would break her heart? And what is this to do about my past? Can't we just have some fun hangout and get to know each other for a while? And then she just left.
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I had thought that i am not going to screw this up. This time i am not. It's now or never. So when she entered the car i gave her the bouquet that i run and bought for her so that i could make it in time. She seemed even more upset seeing the bouquet. "I really don't think we should do this Rohan."
To that i said, " Just give me one chance." She then kep quite and i started the car. I was taking her to the lake again and not college. I know none of us would be able to handle that. "This is not the way to college" she said when she realised. " Is this supposed to be a question?" I tried to make her smile but she just said "not funny" and opened her mouth and closed it as if she wanted to speak but then decided against it.
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We reached the lake and then I held her hand and we sat. I wanted to give her the chocolate but then again she said ,"Why are you doing this? Why do you even want me? I am not your type. There are plenty of girls more beautiful then me and you could easily have any of them." Why is she making it even harder. "  Now i just couldn't control. But i just couldn't be anything but melted when i look into her eyes. I said," Ananya is my ex-girlfriend. We were inseperable since we were little kids. In school, all the girls wanted me but i wanted her. We didn't actually start dating until we were in the 8th grade. I was just so much in love with her that i couldn't see anything or anyone. But she was a cold hearted bitch. I don't know how i didn't know this before. She just dated me because it made us the "power couple" of school. Riya once saw her with a guy and she tried to warn me and tell me but I didn't listen. Then one day i went to surprise her to her house. Her parents were out of town and i saw her in bed with another guy. After 3 years of dating she did this and she didn't even say sorry for once. I was devastated. That is when i decided that i am never going to fall for anyone else in my life. It always will be just physical. That is when Riya was there for me and so i am the most close to her in the world. She was like the only girl i trusted....until now. Don't worry i am not saying that I have fallen madly in love with you but that doesn't mean i won't. And yesterday i lived it again. I saw my sister devastated. But that is also when i realised that i was wrong. I was becoming her. She just loves to see me alone and last year she came to London too and that is the main reason Riya decided to shift her studies here. When i saw Rahul there kissing my bestfriend i just couldn't help but see myself in him kissing any random girl. I have no idea why Yash did this but atleast i know what I want now. I know that i want you. All of you, not a part and not just sex for sure. You are the only girl I have been able to trust alart from Riya and i don't want to let it go. I don't want to let this go. And i completely understand if you don't want anything too." She just stared at me and i was confused . I was really scared. For the first time i let my heart out for i girl now and she isn't saying a word, but i saw a tear down her eyes. " Say something Sania please. Anything. Don't cry Sania did i say something i shouldn't have?" And she just hugged me, tight and this moment i knew that this is what i want. In 3 years for the first time i was genuinely happy for myself. I wasn't gonna let this girl go anywhere now. I am not going to screw it.