It is said, everybody has his own cross to bear. But this isn't right. I want to help where ever help is needed. But for some things I am too inexperienced, for others too weak and for the rest I am not able to get the right words.
So it happens, that I can't help the most of time and being watched from others at the same time.
If it happens now that I've got a problem, the others feeling concerned and want to help me; they use often many of their power and time, let other important things lay at the side, they're concerned about me, so my problems been bearing by them emotionally too.
Let it be physical or financial or other problems, my biggest problem is that my package, my cross, whom I should the only one to bear, been try to handle by others, even though they've got problems too, I know it and I see it, that are minimum my problem package, mostly bigger.
And then I wanna help them, but I can't, because for some I am too inexperienced for others I am too weak and for the rest I am not able to find the right words...
That doesn't mean I am not thankful for the help of others, but this hard, selfless work to help others shows me everytime how helpless I am and that worries me and makes me feel unhappy.
But before I drown in into this madness, I think about those who try to help me, because if I do, drowning into it, I would take some down with me and other ones have to bear much more emotionally vices and will suffer more.
So I trust the one, who can take all my carries finally away, without getting burdened by them and hope that his will take place, as in heaven, also on earth, so that no one has ever has to bear anything anymore, because all of them were getting away from us and were put as far off as the sunrise is from the sunset.
