What The Fuck are You?

1

Another peaceful day, Al was enjoying his coffee at his favourite Cafe where his dear almost daughter-like friend worked.
Niffty was a short but very cute redhead girl who had known Alastor for quite some time- And let me tell you, she DID NOT care for Alastor's dirty little secret, in fact, she had suspected him of murder long before he had told her about it.
She knew he would've eaten a human with no hesitation, she knew he wouldn't care for the screams of mercy,
She knew him for his sadistic ways and dark humor, yet she didn't care.

Niffty saw Al as a father and she knew he wouldn't hurt her on purpose- She knew he wouldn't hurt Charlie, Angel OR Vaggie without a reason.
Niffty knew Al, and she didn't mind it one bit that he'd stick his hand into someone's chest to eat their insides, she just didn't care about that, though she did worry about Alastor himself.

Though, who would suspect such a skinny radio host like him?
And even if someone DID suspect him, his charms would take all that suspicion away.
Plus, he always had an alibi.

"Thank You again my dear for the marvelous coffee!" The brunette serial killer thanked his small friend before leaving.

"Anytime Al!" she yelled after him, waving.

The whole town knew Alastor for his broadcasts and for his Social status.
He was also known for his charm.
No one knew where he lived, all they knew was he would appear or disappear.

He always kept everything a secret and told no one, not even his closest friends- Niffty didn't count as a friend, she was more of a family due to him being alone.

Alastor headed to his Radio Station, greeting everyone on his way to work.
He got free pastries from the baker and he was greeted by the mayor.

Alastor got to go to special parties and got invited to all meetings, big or small.
He was basically the MVP in the town and everyone thought they knew him so well, yet they honestly didn't know a thing about him.
They didn't know they were all his pawns set on a chess match, they didn't know how powerful he really was or how smart he was.

He finally got to his station and completed his work, he packed up and set back off.
He waved goodbye to everyone and went into the Woods, ready for a... 'Hunt'

The town always wondered why no one ever came to travel through the town, but Alastor knew.
The travelers would go through the forest and not return as Al would hunt them and eat them.

He would watch them scream in agony as they knew that death's jaws were ready to snap on them, even if they ran.
He would watch them think they've made it to safety then he would crush their tiny last bits of hope and slowly dismember them.
Al would drag them all the way to his house then he'd slice them up, letting them bleed out and cry as he nommed on them.

Today was no different, though he DID have a pleasant surprise when Niffty popped up and cleaned his mess.
He enjoyed a nice cup of coffee and tea with the short 20 year old and chatted with her a while.

"My Dear, How Have you been?" He put his cup down.

She giggled, placing her tea cup down too.
"You asked me that this morning." she smiled.

"I am aware of that." he smiled back,
"Just want to know you're okay."

"I'm all good, just a bit worried, you're all alone and I was wondering... maybe you'd want some company, maybe a dog-" She shook her head, Alastor wasn't very fond of dogs,

"A cat?" She looked up at him.

He blinked a few times then his smile widened,
"Haha! I appreciate the concern darling, but I'm okay, it'd just be another mouth to-"

"Cats can hunt for themselves! And I've seen the way you love to socialize only to hurt those people whenever you can. Cats do that too." She held her point,

The Radio Host stared blankly,
He thought and hummed softly.
"Oh okay, If you're THAT worried, I'll have a think about it." He finished his coffee,

She smiled, victorious.
"Well, I'll see you at the cafe tomorrow? Same time as always?" Niffty stood.

Alastor nodded,
"Same time, same place, same routine as always." He said and bid her a farewell.

Once that was done, he headed to do his nightly routine before bed.