No Number

Chapter 2

I can't think straight for days. No number? This has never happened, never. My brain continuously tries to find a solution, each assumption wilder than the last. My wife has noticed that there is something wrong and keeps trying to comfort me, but I haven't told her. I can't. Nobody knows about my secret, and I've vowed that nobody ever will, because I know the cruelness behind some smiling faces; it is the number that betrays all secrets. My only rest is working at the office that was once a tiring, dull chore but is now a relief from the constant thoughts that surround the new man. Apart from lunchtime. That is the worst part. John insists William sits with us, and that is enough to set me into silent panic mode as I sit eating my lunch, trying to ignore all that is around me. I've been asked time and time again about what's wrong, and I just shrug and leave.

Lying in bed once again, my thoughts whirl, and I dreadfully wait for the dream to come. It has been the same since he joined. I stay awake, resisting the urge to just sleep, until my lids droop and I am helplessly dragged into the world of darkness.

I am on the edge of a moonlit forest, the trees reaching up to catch the stars, almost blocking the luminescent ball of light that I bathe in. The biting wind and leafless trees suggest the season, and yet I am wearing nothing but a shirt and trousers. I stand there, my feet slowly sinking into wet mud, waiting for... something. Something. As the dampness begins to seep through my clothes, I spot a movement, a flash, something quick, sending a chill racing up my spine and my hairs to stand on end. A glint. It glides towards me, stealthy, silver, and I open my mouth to utter a yell... 

And I find myself in bed, sweaty and panting, recovering from the same dream yet again. I take a gulp of water, and breathe slowly so as to calm my racing heart. And, breathe. My wife stirs a little, then sighs and turns onto her side. I look at her, then at the curtains, then at my phone. It's 2 in the morning. Just like last night, and the night before, and the one before that. Running my fingers through my thick brown hair, I lie back again, and try to not think about the new guy who has caused me so much distress. 

"Look, Michael, you need to open up man, why have you been so quiet recently?" I breathe out of my nose in a frustrated way, and give John a look. He's pulled me away from everyone just for this? Are you kidding me?

"I just don't like the look of William, that's all, we've gone through this time and time again," I reply.

"Why? And why do you seem tired all the time?"

"I don't know and I don't know, ok?"

"C'mon Michael, tell me, I won't tell anyone, I promise."

"Well it's hard to open up when there isn't anything to say. Just give up John."

He frowns, then walks off and I stare regretfully at his retreating back, knowing I have just broken yet another a bond in our friendship.

The next few days of work are torture in one way, but good in another. I may have nobody to speak to, but that gives me the chance to focus on my work and not on anything else, and at lunch I sit with a random colleague, or sometimes alone. And at home, I've begun to feel a little better, because I don't have to encounter William everyday (at least not up close) and my toddler is growing up so quickly I am preoccupied with teaching him. However, at times, when my mind is enveloped in dark thoughts, the image of William creeps up to me, and that is when I am reminded of the same, continuous dream that haunts me during dark hours. There is no escape. It finds me as soon as I close my eyes, the scene that although is scary as heck, begs me to find out its meaning. I never used to believe in dream meanings, but now, the truth seems inevitable, but the result is too far for me to reach. 

As I sit at my desk for another day, I log on, only to find that I have 2 tasks, which I do within an hour. I am actually so happy. I didn't sleep well last night (just like every other, but this time it has hit me hard) which gives me time to rest. Just as I am about to open a random game, I catch William staring at me, with his black eyes, and for a minute I see an image of him looking... wild... crazy... I shake my head, shuddering, and I look back at my computer screen, recovering from a shock that may seem pathetic, but had scared me out of me skin. Stealing another quick glance at him, he seems immersed in his work, acting like he didn't just give me a heart attack. I breathe evenly again. I don't know how or what happened just then, but I guess this is what happens when you fear someone so much. Too much.

Another night. I sigh, climbing into bed early, knowing what will happen at 2 in the morning. And as expected, the nightmare comes, waking me up, and just like time and time again, I slide back into the covers so that I can fall asleep again. Only this time, a thought hits me out of nowhere, slapping me from my covers. A thought... I can never change this. This is the reality. Unless William or I leave, I'm going to be stuck feeling afraid of the man until the end of time. The man with no number.

Contemplating this thought, all hope of sleep is sucked out of me, until by dawn, I am tired, but haven't reached a conclusion. I want to confront him, but with no number, I am not certain what he will do to me, yet I also can't just stay like this. The clock on the wall screams 7:30 at me, so I get up and go downstairs. Maybe I'll find peace sat down. I walk into the living room like a zombie, too tired to do anything but sit on the nearest couch, tilt my head back and close my eyes. I don't know for how long I sit there, but the next thing I know is that I've got a mug of coffee on the couch arm and my wife smiling, her blue eyes sincere, asking me if it was another bad night.

"Thanks, and yeah, it was a bad night," I reply.

"Michael, you need to tell me what's wrong. Seriously. You come home looking like you just died and you can't sleep. What is it?" her face shows such worry, that I find myself saying,

"It's this new guy at work. He has no" I catch my tongue before it reveals everything, and nearly punch myself. Stupid, stupid!

"No what?"

"No..." I search in my head frantically for something to say. Her eyes narrow slightly. "no sense of personal space. It's starting to scare the heck out of me," I manage to get out.

"Hm," she says.

Driving to work, I can't help thinking about one question: Why don't I tell anyone? I know that this is a rule that I have put down for myself since my youth, but I've been thinking about it so often these days that the origin is lost. Maybe it's because it'll hurt everyone I know, because I've been hiding it for so long. Maybe it's because I know people will wonder if I'm mad, or maybe because I don't want anyone to see me differently. After I park, I search for my phone in the pockets of my autumn coat, knowing I'm early, but not wanting to leave the cosiness of the car. I relax, playing a random game on my phone, and wait for 9 to come around. However, just as I start the game, I notice another car coming into the parking lot, and someone turns around. My heart almost stops. Instantly, I am reminded wit the encounter in the office. He sees me, and walks up. With no choice left, I roll down my car window, and he says hey.

"Hey," I say back, trying to keep a normal face.

"You here early?"

"Yes." I see the coolness in his eyes.

"I'm going to go up to work then."

"Ok."

Breathing again, I switch off my phone and decide that I might as well go up, so that I have something to do. Otherwise I'll start overanalysing this conversation. But one thing I did notice up close is that he doesn't look normal. Something about him seems... off. Maybe it's just me being reminded of the image I saw last time, because that was strange. However, this time it is different. I can tell. It's not an image, it's a... sense. A feeling. And a frightening one too.

A burning sensation of eyes scorching my back follows me as I climb the steps. I glance back. Nothing. Frustration creeps up on me, and I think back to last night, where I was overwhelmed by the need to get rid of my feelings. I have to say something. Tomorrow. Tomorrow I'll say... I'll think about it during work. Enough is enough. And anyway, this mystery is pulling me apart from the inside. If I don't do anything, I will die, and not as a result of murder.

                                                                        ~~~

I know this chapter isn't the best, but I tried lol. Critiques, comments and votes appreciated ;)