I have a hole in my stomach that only goes away when I hold my breath. Breathing makes me nervous, I wanna yeet myself into the sun?? Um?? Implode? All that fun stuff.
I have therapy on the 15th and I'm scared. Like weirdly terrified. Idk why. I've met her before, she's really nice. It's just. -- ok, so I get nervous around everyone and I just noticed I tense around my siblings, like at all times
I can't untense and I'm the btch?? Tf?? Calm the shit down. And then is—
Nerves: ok, but what if you stop breathing and don't wake up?
That numb feeling: I'm down fam
Me: but I won't
Nerves: but what if you stop breath holy crap breath
Me: I am breathing
Numb: yeah, stop doing that
What the hecc? My stomach hurts now, and I'm supposed to eat but I'm not hungry (ever) but I'm also always hungry? Wow. I suck at existing.
~karmauh
*bangs head on wall*
YOU ARE READING
Hey There!
Non-Fiction『"I WAS SO FAR BEHIND I THOUGHT I WAS IN FRONT."』 RANT; in which I rant about my nerves and stuff
