sunshine - a short depressed Bakugō fanfic

~{ 2 }~

Bakugō's P.O.V

Wake up shit head.

You again?

Yup, it's me. Wake up. Yesterday you successfully self harmed. Congratulations.

Thanks.

It felt nice, right?

It kinda does-

I'll ask again, it felt nice, right?

It does...

Great. Your mother is coming in a second - be ready.

Yea yea.

I don't think the voice in my head is really all that mean. I mean, he congratulated me, and that's something I never really got unless it's fighting - I guess. I got out of bed and put on my clothes. Right before I got out, mom knocked on my door.

"Wake up brat! It's 6:00 AM!"

6? What time did you wake me up?

I don't really know.

Ugh. Fine - whatever.

"I'm already awake old hag!"

"Don't talk to your mother like that!"

"Whatever!"

I was on my phone for an hour in my room, trying to get pass time. After that, I put my phone in my bag and head out.

Why do you have friends? Or do you even call them friends?

I call them friends - I think. And I don't really know anymore.

Ahh... I have an idea! Just sit on your desk quietly for the rest of the day! Then no ones life gets miserable.

Okay, good idea.

That's my boy.

****

Class has started and I've only sat on desk quietly like what they said. I follow what they says because, well - my body wants to. And I'll just have to deal with it.

"Bakugō. Are you paying attention?" Mr. Aizawa speaks up.

"Yea yea" I say, my voice barely audible.

****
It's lunch time-

Don't go to lunch. It'll make you fat.

Oh okay. Can I go out then?

No. If you do, it'll make everyones life miserable. You don't want that do you?

No...

Right. Then just sit on your desk.

Okay...

****

It's time to go back home-

Wait until everyone leaves.

Why?

What if people talk behind your back?

Oh... okay...

****

I got back home late. I felt... lonely... it felt like no one loves me. I know mom and dad does, but - it doesn't feel like they love me, for me. The voice also seems pretty manipulative, he didn't want me to eat lunch, he didn't want me to get out of class and he also told me to go back after everyone else does. He sometimes scares me but it's fine. As long as he helps me - even if it's a little bit.

I locked myself in the room. I felt like crying.

You feel like crying don't you?

Yeah

You can cry, no one is here.

Heh, thanks...

I cried my heart out. And I tried to do it as quiet as possible so no one hears me. After an hour or two of crying. He speaks up again.

You done?

I guess so

Okay, grab the scissors again. You like the feeling right?

Mhm

Good boy. Now go.

I do the same thing he tells me to. It feels, great. It feels relieving. It feels like all my worries has been taken away - but only for a couple of seconds - so I do it again.

I'm tired

You can stop now I think

Okay

Take the first aid kit

Okay..?

I take the first aid kit from under my bed.

What now?

Open it and grab the bandages.

Why?

Tomorrow you need to wear your hero costume. We don't want people to see it correct?

Yeah

So do it, wrap it up. And in the morning it'll be recovered so no one would really see the cuts unless they're really close. So don't go close to other people when you're in that thing

Alright

I bandaged it up and got ready to sleep.

Goodnight Katsuki

Night...

- - - -

656 words

I'm starting to think that I'm making the voice in his head like Tsukasa from JSHK (not related to BNHA sorry)

finished : 7th april 2020

edited     : 23rd july 2020