DuncDoc

Don't You Remember Me?

"I wonder where you are, Muds."
Duncan wiped a puny tear off his face. It's been about 4 years since Duncan and Murdoc last spoke; in Murdoc's little studio. It was a beautiful night. The skies were purple, with pink rays of light seeping through the awaiting darkness. The sun was setting, even with such a calming atmosphere, it was nothing compared to Murdoc's warm caress. Duncan really couldn't believe the bastard he once knew was mending himself on the inside. Murdoc always seemed like a harsh degenerate, or at least to Duncan when he first got thrown in jail. But now he sees that tough guy he once knew was slowly melting his broken heart back together. Yes, melting. All those pieces of deprivation, sadness, emptiness, and dissociation would be melted like wax into something beautiful. Into the real Murdoc Niccals. And it's all because of Duncan.

[Flashbacks are in italics 😀😐🥒]

"Hey, love, have I ever told you how beautiful you look? I love your pretty green hair. Your blue eyes, so full of life. You're a pretty boy. A sweet boy." (Murdoc)

"Sweet? How?"

"I don't think you'd realize it. You're the reason why I feel... happier. I have someone to guide, y'know? I see myself in you. Don't ever be like me, though. Duncan, you are living the life I never had. I promise I'll guide you all the way through. I want you to be happy. You hear me? I want you to be happy."

Duncan never heard Murdoc talk like this. Never. 'What came over him?' he thought. But Duncan understood everything he said. Duncan was still growing under Murdoc's wings and put his mind set on spending the rest of his life with Murdoc. But now he isn't here. Where must he be? Making music, Duncan assumes. Doesn't he realize what he left behind?

"GOD, WHERE ARE YOU? WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU? WHY ARE YOU NOT.. here..."

Duncan was sobbing warm tears of loneliness. Each droplet, oh how he wishes Murdoc would attend to.

"Why do I love you, Murdoc? W..Why?" Duncan said to himself. He cried so much, he was whimpering under his crossed arms. He could only imagine how warm Murdoc's arms were. His soft, warm, gentle arms. Those arms were magic.

"Hey, Duncan?"
"Yeah, man?"
"Kiss me."
"R..Really? You, of all people? Asking... haha... for a kiss? Don't play with me, man... ha- oh."
"Oh, fuck off."
"Sorry, man. I didn't... I didn't think.."
"Yeah, you didn't think. Come here and kiss me, bitch."
Their lips conjoining felt like paradise. Murdoc's lips were so warm, Duncan's was so soft, they were perfect for each other. Their tongues swiped around each other for a good minute, with each second pleasuring the two. Murdoc's comforting hands held Duncan's jaw. Murdoc mumbled into the kiss, it felt so amazing to feel Duncan's lips, the lips of an angel's. Duncan started bobbing his head a little, he just couldn't get enough of that man.

"I don't care that you called me a bitch. I'll always... I'll always be yours, Muds. Always..."
...
"SNAP OUT OF IT!" Duncan screamed.
It's all too much. If he thought about Murdoc for another second, Duncan was sure to break. Murdoc was the only man who fixed his heart with so much caring time put into it. Murdoc wanted Duncan to be happy, it was like Murdoc's life purpose was to satisfy Duncan. Gwen didn't think about Duncan's heart. Neither did Courtney. It really made him think, 'Why did they love me? Because I'm a bad boy? That's it?' Murdoc made Duncan feel like a different person in those cells. Murdoc guided him all the way through and pushed boundaries to understand who Duncan was. Duncan was suffering inside, too. It concerned Murdoc. Every pouty face, every cry, every joyous moment; it was Murdoc's prized gem.

'Oh man, it's because I spent too much money, wasn't it? Right? RIGHT? Oh, Murdoc, I'd do anything. ANYTHING, for you to be back here. Come back.. come back... come back. I don't know what to do.. Oh, Murdoc... I won't spend anymore money! Having you by my side is all the treasure I need! I need you Murdoc! I love... I love... fuck. I'm going insane.'

Another night, another crescent moon. Another lonesome night of pitying stars surrounding Duncan. There's no hope. No shooting star. No blue moon. No Murdoc. Duncan wrapped himself in a lime-colored, velvet, weighted blanket.

"I love you, Murdoc. I really do. Goodnight." He whispered to himself.

END OF CHAPTER ONE