Saved by him

The Pain is Unbearable

NO! STOP. His soft voice screaming my name. My vision keeps blurring as he's screaming. I'm reaching out for him but I can't find him. NO!!!! BOOM. BOOM. BOOM. Everything suddenly went black and I couldn't hear his voice anymore. NO!!!!!!!

3 years before

The sun gleams into my bedroom as I'm waking up for the morning. Another horrible day in this stupid house. Everyone else in my house is already up doing their own thing. "About time you get the hell up," a deep voice says angrily. My dads an asshole, he is always yelling at me for something I am about to be seventeen in two months and he's still treating me like a kid. "It's only ten Dad," I muffled under my breath. His face beat red, glaring at me with anger in his eyes. I am in deep shit now. He constantly loves to yell at me for something. He walks up to me and punches me in the face so hard that my hearing goes out. "DONT EVER TALK BACK TO ME AGAIN UNDERSTAND," he spits. "UNDERSTAND," he repeats. "Yes..," I say quietly sobbing. "Stop crying and get the hell out of my face," he says shoving me. Falling hard on the ground while everyone else in the house just stares at me. They always just watch me getting hurt. They never stick up for me. My dad has been hurting me for six years. From pushing me to choking me to even pushing me down the stairs telling me I don't matter and that no one would love me. I didn't wanna believe that because I know I'll find someone some day, just takes time. He will get all the karma coming to him.

I get up and go into my room sobbing into my pillow. Listening to him talking crap about me. I close my eyes to drown out his voice. Drifting off, my eyes getting heavy and finally I fall asleep. Everything goes black and I've fallen asleep. Then out of nowhere I feel a force grab me out of my bed and throw me on the ground scaring me out of my sleep. It was my dad. "GET THE FUCK UP, YOU DONT NEED TO FUCKING SLEEP. LAZY ASS," he says spitting in my face. He kept hovering my face. Tears rolling down my face as I was screaming. Hyperventilating. "shut the fuck up, man the fuck up," he says slapping me in the face. "STOP TOUCHING ME, STOPPP," I scream loudly. "What the fuck did you just say?" He grabbed me by my hair. "NOTHING," I screamed. "DONT TALK BACK TO ME AGAIN," he said throwing me on the ground. "Fucking clean up this room," he says walking away. Tears still rolling down my face. My face already hurt from earlier, now it's my head. The pain is unbearable. I'm not aloud to sleep. I'm not aloud to do anything. I'm not even aloud to talk. He's been doing this forever. It's his way or I get hit. If I even respond back without permission he will hurt me again. The biggest thing is if I cry he makes me cry even more. I'm not aloud to do anything. He's been controlling me for forever. All anyone has told me to do was leave. It's not that easy no one understands. I sit up and clean my room, then I go out in the kitchen to get something to eat. He glares at me while I eat my food. I can't even eat my food without getting stared at like I'm some criminal.

I put my plate in the sink and then go back into my room. " Nuh uh you can come hang out with your family," he demanded. FAMILY? Family don't hurt each other and tell each other they don't matter. This isn't my family. They ALL constantly treat me like shit to make themselves feel better. They have nothing better to do than bully me. I walk over to my sister jasmine and she moves over. There wasn't room on the couch besides where she sat. She made my other sister sit by her. My dad didn't want me to sit by him either so I sat on the floor. My stepmom sat next to my dad and I cuddled my dog on the ground. I could feel him staring at me the entire movie. I cried into my dogs body while my other plopped on me, laying on my stomach. This was my only happiness. Getting me through was my dogs. I don't know what I'd do without them.

My sister started to get mad like she always does seeing me cuddling with MY dogs. She calls the dogs to her so I couldn't let them. "Don't touch MY dogs," she says with attitude. My parents just let it happen. They let her talk to me like that. Tell me that they are HER dogs. I'm the one that take care of them. I feed them. I bathe them. I water them. I pick up THEIR DOG SHIT. She wants to say they are HERS? They are mine if anything. They don't even take care of them. They torture them. My dogs are afraid of her, that's the only reason they listen to her. She hurts them all the time. She left me sitting on the ground without anything. I couldn't lay down, nothing. My dad yelled at me for even laying against the couch to lean on. I waited for the day to go by so I could go in my room on Snapchat.

I wasn't aloud to go on any social media. They treated me like I was a kid. I was grounded already from something that happened a year ago. I've been grounded for a whole year over the same thing. I have a phone that I've sneaked into my house. This time I'm more cautious then ever because all the other times they found the phones I've hidden and they took them. They constantly spy on me now to see if I have a phone or not. I'm not aloud to close my door at all unless if I have to change. My stepmom always comes in my room while I change so that way I'm not "doing" something I'm not supposed to. I wait til everyone goes to bed in the house. My dad is always the last person to fall asleep but he don't even fall asleep til two in the morning.

I stay up all night staring into the darkness. I am exhausted from everyday of him doing this to me. I'm mentally and physically exhausted but I can't sleep here. I never sleep. I only get like two hours if I'm lucky three. That's why I try to sleep during the day. It finally hit two and I heard my dad walk downstairs to go to bed. I waited like twenty minutes so that way he didn't come back up. I grabbed my phone out of my slipper. I always had clever ways of hiding my things. I went onto Facebook and started to scroll because I was bored. I texted people back to tell them what happened. I texted my sister Alyssa. She was so worried that she called me and I talked to her for a little bit then went hack to Facebook.

I started looking at the "You may know" list. I seen a guy named Dominic. His hair was quite long, he had a little mustache under his nose and on his chin. His brown hair and he eyes made me feel different. "He is so handsome omg," I thought. There's no way he would talk to someone like me. I decided to text him. He texted me shortly after and from then on there we started talking. We talked all night long and even FaceTimed. He is everything I've been looking for. Sweet, caring handsome. I found out that we are a lot alike and we are both going through a lot. He lost his mom at a young age which is so sad. When he told me that it broke my heart. My heart dropped but I told him that I'm always here for him anytime he needs anyone to talk to. He was in a dark rough place but I knew that I needed to hold onto him. He is different than other guys. There's something about him and I'm gonna find out. He makes me tingle inside and I want him to be mine. God I want him to be mine. I really think I just fell in love. Love at first sight. It's a thing. I can't believe this. He's just perfect. My bad day jus turned into a great day.