Kpop imagines!!!

Jonghyun (SHINee)

A/N: I put myself through tears to write this as a tribute for what would've been Jonghyun's 30th birthday.
Trigger warning: touches on the subject of Suicide. If you find this uncomfortable please don't read.
If you suffer from suicidal thoughts please remember you are not alone and my Twitter is always open (@Aimzyrulez on Twitter)
Also if Terminal Illnesses count as needing a trigger warning. That's in place too.
Now onto the most heartbreaking thing I've ever had the opportunity to write.

You were out of town when you got the call about your boyfriend Jonghyun. You thought that it was all just one big joke but he did in fact take his own life while you were away.

You knew his job as an idol wasn't always easy on him and he'd come home to your shared apartment in tears over his hard work on his solo albums and his ideas for SHINee being rejected.

It broke your heart for him to be like this.

You knew his depression was getting worse but you still tried to help him through every single day one at a time. It was all you could do as his girlfriend. Give him words of encouragement as his work takes its toll.

Needless to say as soon as you got the call you immediately got a flight back home because not only did you need support, but so did his members. They were grieving too. Including your own brother Minho. It broke your heart to see your brother so upset.

"Why did he have to leave us? WHY!" He would ask. His mind was mostly still filled with rage.

"Because heaven needed him more than we did apparently." You'd respond back.

Little did Jonghyun know, you had a secret of your own you were going to share when you got home. You weren't going to live much longer yourself. You had breast cancer and weren't doing very well against it. The whole reason you went overseas was to see a doctor about your current situation and life expectancy. Minho didn't even know. But now you somehow had to tell him that his dear younger sister may not even be around much longer. Jonghyun knew you were sick. He just didn't know how bad.

*time skip a month ahead*
You'd deteriorated rapidly. Minho had to look after you at all times meaning you had to tell him you had cancer.

He didn't take it well. It was not a good couple of months for Flaming Charisma Minho.

You were in hospital now. Until the time came for you to pass on.

"Minho...." your voice came out very soft. Minho hadn't left your side in a week. He'd eaten when you told him to. But he looked like a mess otherwise.

"Yes? Oh god (Y/N)...you're so pale" Minho commented not realising the full extent of what was actually happening.

"Minho. Promise me you'll move on? Make more music? For both me and Jonghyun?" You asked.

"Always (Y/N). Always. Wait. Why both of you? What are you saying?" Minho realised halfway through his sentence what you were implying.

"Minho. I love you my dear crazy older brother. I just can't hang on much longer" You said feeling incredibly weak.

"Then take all the rest you need. Go meet Jonghyun. We'll miss you baby sis." Minho said calmly tearing up.

"I love yo...." You were in the middle of saying when your eyes closed and the machine at your bedside recorded no pulse. Minho started crying, as a Nurse came in and noticed and consoled the idol who had gone through so much in the span of a month.

*meanwhile elsewhere (I'm imagining somewhere like a heaven)*

You noticed a figure in the distance. You suddenly had more energy in your legs than you did a two days ago as you moved toward the figure they turned around to be the one person you wanted to be with you the past month but couldn't.

"Jonghyun." You breathed. That was the point where you ran and engulfed him in a hug.

"Hey what are you doing here (Y/N)? You're supposed to be living a full life..." Jonghyun pauses. "It's because of your illness wasn't it?"

You nodded "I had cancer Jonghyun. I couldn't fight it. I was too weak. Minho stayed with me the whole time."

This time it was Jonghyun who engulfed you in a hug while he cried. "You were gone. I couldn't live with myself. The voices got to me." He says referring to his death.

"I know, I was gone because I had to see a doctor overseas who specialises in breast cancer research. I didn't have much time to begin with so I was going to let you know when I got back but I had to leave early." You replied. "But it's okay, I'm here now. We have each other now."

"Come on. Let's go" he says taking your hand in his as you both walk off somewhere in the afterlife.

____________

A/N: I don't know about you guys but if you get through everything including the little afterlife bit without crying. I applaud you. I'm in tears writing this.

Remember if you need someone to talk to I'm always available. If you have a relative going through cancer treatment and need someone to talk to I'm always here too. Cancer is part of my life at the moment as my great aunt has breast cancer, thankfully she seems to be fighting it really well, but it didn't stop my little sister from crying when she found out about it. Anyways, just remember guys you're not alone, people are always here to talk.

Until next time!
- Aimzy