cold hearted

five

luke

once charlie left i had to tell someone about what just happened. but i cant tell michael because he would probably kill me. he hates the fact that he called dibs on char but she fell for me and i fell for her. thats not my problem.

so i decided to go to my neighbor who is only one year older than me, but i still go to him with all of my problems and he seems to give me the best advice.

i walked out of my house and across the street and knocked on the door.

"luke?" he asked groggily pulling at the ends of his hair, to fix it so it didnt look like he had just woken up.

"calum. did i wake you up? well i need to talk. and you need to help me. is your mum here, or?" i started rambling.

"luke, shut the fuck up. my mum is on a buisness trip so shes out of town, im home alone for the rest of the week. what do you need?" he said to me in an annoyed voice, opening the door far enough for me to walk in.

"so you remember how mikey and i started messing around with that group of people and then we started uhm, having fun with guns and such and then we started well -- killing people." i said as i sat down on the couch, calum sitting next to me.

"yes luke. i remember. you havent started doing that again? luke i swear to fucking god -" calum started but i cut him off.

"cal calm down. no. i havent done it. i met this girl, and i - i did something terrible to her. i hurt her in the worst way possible, but she doesnt know it was me. and she means a whole fucking lot to me. but i screwed up. calum, i killed her brother. he was the last of her family and they were like best friends. and i took him away. i shot him. three times." i said, i felt tears start to well up. but i couldnt cry, at least not in front of calum.

"luke. you cant keep seeing this girl. its not going to end pretty. its going to end with you in jail." calum said.

"but i cant just stop. i've tried. it doesnt work, shes all i think about. shes on my mind all the time." i said.

"you have to luke. you have to end it." he said to me.

"what if she just doesnt find out?"

-

three days later

its been three days since ive seen charlie, i havent even talked to her in three days. i havent been responding to her texts. ive been thinking a lot. i have to end it between her and i. and cant risk going to jail. cal was right. right then, my phone buzzed and i walked over to it.

charlie - lukeyy. you think its okay to give me three giant ass hickeys and then not talk to me?

luke - oh please. who do you thinks gonna care, not like you have any family left to scold you for them.

hopefully she wont respond. we have school tomorrow, and i am going to sadly see her. but at least i can actually see her face and i can hopefully stop imagining it.

i havent stopped thinking about that afternoon at my house after school on friday. the way her lips felt against mine. the way she acted, she acts so innocent. but the way she felt, how our hips grinded against each others, how our lips fell in perfect synch with mine.

i got another text and it snapped me out of my daydream.

charlie - luke. what the fuck has gotten into you. your a fucking terrible person. i cant believe you would say that. you know how my brother was brutally murdered. you know how much it kills me to think about it. do you want me to fucking leave you alone, because all you have to do is ask.

luke - im sorry. im so sorry i dont know what has gotten into me. i miss you. can you please meet me at my house. i need to talk to you, please. i get it if you say no. i fucked up. im sorry. im a shitty person i know, and you can yell at me in person or whatever. but i need to see you. we need to talk.

-

ohhh. whats luke gonna dooo?

whats he gonna talk about???

will charlie accept him??

so many questions hmmm, guess we will just have to wait & see what happens :-)