My Wonderful Insanity II

Paralysed.

I Stood There Frozen. Unable To Move.

‘What Is There To Save Me Anymore? Diskay, Alex, Michael, They May Be Strong But They Can’t Help Me Like Ricky Could, They Don’t Know Me Like He Does, They Haven’t Saved My Life Several Times. I Don’t Love Any Of Them. I’ve Never Admitted It But I’ve Always Loved Ricky, I’ve Always Wanted Him To Turn Around And Ask Me To Be His… Now That’s All Gone, There’s Nothing Left. I’m All Alone In This World Fighting For My Life With No Weapon… I’ll Die A Painful Death And Burn In The Fires Of Hell For A Lifetime Until I Give In And Let The Darkness Take Me Away. What’s Worth Living For Now? What Do I Have Now? I Have My Friends, My Mother My Father And The Leper’s But That’s Not Enough. It Means Nothing Without Ricky’

Alex Pulled Me Into A Hug But I Pushed Him Away Running Out The Room Down The Stairs Past Diskay And Michael Who Just Stared At Me And Out The Door.

‘I Don’t Even Know Where I’m Going… All I Know Is I’m Going To Die. Maybe That’s A Good Thing Now. Maybe It’s My Purpose In Life… To Die’

I Ran In The Dark Night Air As Far And As Fast As I Could Away From That House.

Suddenly I Fell To My Knees In Tears That Would Not Stop.

“Oh God! Kill Me!” I Cried Holding My Chest From The Pain Of Crying.

I Looked Ahead Through My Tear Filled Eyes And Saw A Dark Figure Walking Away From Me.

I Didn’t Know Who It Was But It Just Proves To Me That NO ONE Cares…

I Lay Myself Down On The Cold Pavement Still Sobbing.

Did I Want To Move? NO! I Wanted To Stay Here Until I Died Of Starvation.

I Closed My Eyes Letting Sleep Take Me Over.

**********

My Eyes Opened To See An Old Man Tapping Me Awake.

“Are You Okay Young One?” He Asked With A Concerned Voice I Nodded My Head And Sat Up.

“Do You Want Me To Find You’re Parents?” He Asked As I Stood Up.

“No, I’m Homeless” I Lied Looking Down At The Ground.

“Do You Need Somewhere To Stay?” He Questioned. ‘Like Is Wasn’t Obvious’

I Nodded My Head. He Pulled A Card Out From His Pocket And Handed It To Me.

“It’s A Shelter Home, It’s For The Homeless, They Can Give You A Bed, Warm Clothes And Food” He Told Me With A Warm Smiled. I Nodded.

“Thank You Sir” I Weakly Spoke And Walked Away From Him.

‘Should I Go To The Shelter?’

I Wonder The Streets Until I Reached The Main Town And Sat Down At A Bench.

‘I Should Leave. Leave This Town And Start A New Life, Away From My Family And The Danger’

Looking Around I Saw Ricky From A Distance Talking To Jake.

‘I Bet Jake Hates Me Now Too…’

I Looked Down At My Clothes And Saw That They Were Ripped And Torn And Half Covered In Dirt.

Joys Of Sleeping On The Sidewalk.

“Young Man, Are You Okay?” An Older Girl Than Me Asked Walking Up To Me.

I Nodded And Showed Her The Card The Old Man Gave Me.

“You Poor Young Thing, Do You Want Me To Take You There?” She Asked With A Concerned Face.