Tumblr Stories H.S.

Two Ghost Part 2

The one where she's insignificant, alone and hurting.

Y/N walked all the way home, getting lost numerous times and possessing a set of cuts on her bare legs from the times of impact when she'd ran from the eyes of the public, or ran so she could get home before any man had the chance to come near her. She was paranoid, the hairs on the back of her neck stood straight, she tried to blink the tears blurring her vision away.

She was alone.

Y/N had always loved being surrounded by a number of people, ever since she had been young. People who loved her, because the more people you were close with the more would be there for you when you needed it the most, right?

But that wasn't true.

As Y/N began to grow up, she started letting a selected number of people into her. People who she thought truly mattered, who thought she mattered right back. But it'd always be her driving them back home when they were drunk, it was always her making the chicken soup and taking care of them when they were sick, it was always her being the punching bag they took their inner frustrations out upon. People are always trying to find the opposite of loneliness, but what's the point? What's the point when no one is there when you need it the most?

Companionship can only go so long, until you have to pay someone to listen to your problems, instead of telling someone who's supposed to care for you that you feel like you're at your breaking point. Because if we tell others how we truly feel, we'll be perceived as the weak, dramatic people, and will eventually be left. We are ultimately the ones who feel loneliness, because we do not want to be lonely.

Although it was futile, y/n continued to hope someone would come who would truly be her "opposite of loneliness." But it never happened. Boyfriends came and go; some bruising her with their words and actions, others going as far to use her body to relieve their tension, scarring her physically and mentally. As much as she tried to forget about it, tried not to question why everyone abandoned her, why she was only ever temporary, why she was so unlovable, she lived it all over again during the endless night.

When Harry came by, y/n's heart was hesitant for the first time. So, she said 'no' when he asked her out. It broke her heart when she said no to him, his response being a stuttered 'oh. Okay. Sorry," before he fled the scene, but it had to be done. They were all there at first, until they weren't anymore. Why would he be any different?

Y/N and Harry kept meeting by coincidence, either in simple coffee shops, or huge celebrity gatherings. They unconsciously began going not a day without each other's presence. They were friends, but there was a special air that they could both feel. Something that was precious and silently theirs.

Friendship grew to something else, and before they knew it, they were on a field filled with daises and pretty, yellow dandelions. Y/N was wearing a white sundress, the straps falling off of her shoulders as she laughed, and they were under an oak tree, far away from reality. Harry asked her if he could kiss her, and she said yes. So he did, and they kissed for the rest of that day, before Harry finally asked again, nervous, but hopeful and quite smug when she said yes.

The fans noticed soon after, and there were still many haters, but that was okay. It was him and her.

People who had left her began to make an entrance again, but she had locked the gates and set the walls high again, because she had Harry and that was enough. It would always be enough. Or so she thought.

Now, here she was, with scratched up legs and a worn dress, with aching feet and an exhausted mind. This was it for her. She couldn't take anymore.

It was well after dawn when y/n had finally reached home- or, she corrected herself, Harry's home.

She bitterly laughed at herself, for spending months painting a fucking series dedicated to some who didn't love her back, instead of paying attention to how weak the relationship really was. Pathetic.