Bloom Into You [discontinued]

.5//prolouge

Foreword//Hello babies! I have recently finished the Haikyuu manga waiting for the new ep coming in july and I must say...I LOVE ATSUMU SO MUCH!!! Anyways I wanted to be a little self indulgent and try my hand at a 'x reader' fic! I will try my best to be more consistent with my uploads ;0;. Also, please keep in mind that this is a depressed!reader au (ig??) so please tread with caution and heed the warnings in the description <3

Also if you like this story please consider following me and reading my other stories! :D

[edited :)]

           Your life always seemed to be full of more downs than ups. Ever since your childhood, your trust in adults was ripped away from you forcefully by those exact people. You'd grown to despise men after the countless times you were taken advantage of during adolescence, almost convincing yourself you were a lesbian because that hate for them grew each day. But with a pang of self hatred and pain, you knew that you were still attracted to them. Hence another problem appeared: your bisexuality. Your parents were devout christians who expected their daughter to be a well mannered, god fearing, straight-a, heterosexual, respectful, virgin of a girl. But you weren't. You believed in god but not one specifically. you tended to be rude, pushing people away so they don't hurt you. Your virginity was taken away from your forcefully by the teacher who looked at your innocent young eyes and warned you about stranger danger when the true dangers lie in people who gain your trust and thrust themselves into your life like they would thrust into you. Every movement causing your petite body to quiver and shake; not out of pleasure but in pain. No preparation, no lubricant, nothing. He shoved himself into as you cried and screamed and scratched, trying to get him to stop. But he didn't. After the deed was done he would gaslight and manipulate you, "You can't tell anyone. They'll think you're disgusting.". So you kept it to yourself, your screams of agony becoming quieter and quieter until you eventually stopped struggling, letting him have his way with you. It would end faster that way.

It all stemmed from that incident, you became more volatile and irritable at home and school and to other people. This, of course, caused issues between the people in your life and you. Your parents began to disregard you, yelling at you at every opportunity and even making you sleep outside the house in the middle of winter with nothing but the clothes on your back if you angered them. As the number of your siblings rapidly grew to 4 you soon found yourself ignored by the rest of your family. No one talked to you, no one cared for your existence, they provided you with a room for yourself with the basic necessities and a few electronics. If you needed something you were to write it and post it on the fridge. They didn't talk to you, they didn't bother you, they forgot about your existence any other time besides when you needed food.

"Hello my name is Y/N Shimada." Your family had recently moved to a new home, they were soon due to welcome new life and they didn't have sufficient room in your old home. Your parents worked lucrative jobs, so they were able to do this whenever they pleased. They didn't care at how fragile you were and how not having a set home affected you. Inarizaki High. Your new school. "But for how long?" You asked yourself, biting your lip softly. You continued to introduce yourself to your new classmates. "I am 16 years old and one of my passions is writing." The only way you were able to express your feelings without causing physical or mental harm on yourself. "I will be joining the literature and young authors club. It's nice to meet you all, please take care of me." You bowed slightly and looked to the teacher for your seat assignment, thankfully she was a woman. "Your seat is in the back fifth row." She pointed to a seat behind a light brain haired boy who looked bored out of his mind.

"This will be fun." You told yourself, clenching your fists at the fact that he was an obviously well-known and well-liked boy; clearly evident by the jealous glares you got from your female counterparts. "Miya Osamu." The boy said dryly as he stuck out his hand. A cold sweat ran down your back at the thought of touching a man. "I have androphobia." You stated bluntly with an expressionless face and simply sat down in your seat without another word.

Androphobia is considered a specific phobia because it is an overpowering and irrational fear of something — in this case, men — who don't typically pose real danger but still manage to cause anxiety and avoidance behaviors.

Hope you enjoyed reading <3 -Kxxros

Edit: Thanks to my friend Lys who proof reads and edits these chapters you guys get a way more coherent reading experience! Check her out on ig @ crow.aep!