Fire Escape | l.h

no. 6

I hated Calum. Even more now, after he hit Jade. I hoped he'd trip and fall into nonexistence.

Mr. Jackson paced his office, lecturing both Calum and I.

But I was hardly listening.

I was too busy thinking about what Michael and Jade were doing right about now. What if she really likes him? What if he likes her? I've seen couples while walking, and they act a lot like Michael and Jade. Michael always smiling at her, Jade twirling her hair and laughing.

Ugh.

"Both of you have detention after school today, and the rest of the week. I do not want this happening again."

I was silent as I walked out of his office and over to my locker. I had no idea where Michael and Jade were, and it made me furious. I had thought about her every second since we met, and it was freaking me out.

She was just so captivating. She was sweet, confident, gorgeous, and understanding. I like how her hair falls around her face, and how there's always a strand hanging down out of place. I liked how her eyes were so vibrant, and how they sometimes had a bit of gold in them. And how her laughter is contagious.

But I didn't like her. Hah, no.

I was only fascinated by her.

I tried to shake her memory away, and grabbed my stuff to head home.

The walk there was quite the same. I looked at the buildings and the bits of nature. Everything was annoyingly not different. Like everything else in my life. Everyone says people are scared of change, but it's the one thing I crave. I would give anything for my life not to be some tape on replay.

That thought kept repeating as I stepped in the door, and I was surprised to see my parents. I hadn't talked to them last night at all, and I'm sure they were furious with me.

"Luke." My mother said. "What are you doing home?"

"I got in a fight."

"What? Wit-oh nevermind."

She patted the seat next to her, causing me to roll my eyes and sit down unwillingly.

"We need to talk about this...girl you
had with you last night."

God, I knew it.

"What about her?"

She gulped.

"Well, we don't want you being irresponsible. We know how teenage boys think. If you d-"

"What the hell?" I interrupted.

"Well, you took her into your bedroom."

"You think I'm using Jade for sex?! Liz, she's the only friend I've ever had for the years we've been in America! I'm not going to just fuck her!"

"You do not call me Liz. And watch your mouth!"

I stood up quickly, turning to look at her.

"I'll do whatever the hell I please, because you obviously don't know me well enough to know I wouldn't do that to a girl. Especially Jade!"

She threw her head back, laughed.

"You don't let us in! How are we supposed to know you?"

"Well I'd let you in if you hadn't pushed me away all these years! And maybe if you paid better attention to yourselves, all you ever do is tell me how horrible I am."

With that I locked myself in my room again, lying on my bed, feeling fresh hot tears run down my cheeks.

How is it possible for parents to accuse their own child of something like that?

I'm tired of them being displeased with who I am. I can do what I want, and I don't give a shit what they think.

I grabbed a jacket and headed outside, down the fire escape. I had overheard some girls this morning talking about a party tonight at Calum's. Typical of him, having a party every two days.

I was going to go there, and get fucking wasted.

**

As I neared the house, I could see people outside and heard every word of the music.

I didn't feel like standing around outside, so I immediately went in.

It was worse.

Numerous bodies dancing close together, the smell of alcohol hovering, and music so loud it almost burst my eardrums. I walked around, searching for the drinks. It would've been hard to see anything if I wasn't so tall. But I was, therefore I could easily find them.

There was a whole table of filled red cups, and I had no idea what was in them.

I took one at a time and downed it. It burned the back of my throat. I coughed after the first one. But I kept drinking, craving the state of mindlessness.

After I had lost count of my drinks, I knew I was shit-faced. I let out a sigh of contentment, and found myself overcome with boredom. I stumbled to the backyard, and surveyed the area.

Nothing caught my eye until I saw her.

Jade was sitting by herself, drink in hand, looking at everyone. I tried my best to walk normally to her, but I failed miserably.

"Luke?" she asked "are you drunk?"

I giggled.

She stood and walked over to me.

"What are you doing here?"

"I could ask you the same thing, Jade. What? Are you here with Michelle?"

Her eyebrows knitted together in confusion.

"Who the hell is Michelle?"

I groaned. God, she was dumb.

"Michelle! With the weird hair."

A look of realization took over her face as she bursted into a short fit of laughter, and smiled at me. I could see the amusement dancing in her eyes.

Why was she laughing?

"You mean Michael?"

"That's what I said...just answer my question."

She sighed, but then nodded, confirming my fears.

"He offered to take me."

"Oh."

I started to turn away, wanting to be away from her. I have no idea why I feel so strongly about the idea of her and Michael together. Just thinking of it makes me sick.

"Luke!" she called.

I wanted to drink again.

The second time I was in the kitchen, I saw the bottle. I grabbed it, not caring what it was, and starting drinking while I walked home.

It was colder out, and the cold alcohol wasn't helping.

The last thing I remember was looking at a street sign, signaling I had made it about halfway home.