Aelburn (WATTY'S 2020)

.thirteen.°°

"Life is to be lived, not controlled; and humanity is won by continuing to play in face of certain defeat."

Ralph Ellison, The Invisible Man

December 29th, 2199

WILLOW

Agony isn't a feeling you can't completely understand until you've experienced it. Until you've felt your soul trying to escape the pain, the unrelenting torture, you can't fully understand it. I thought I had known agony, thought I had felt her cold fingertips against my skin. I thought I had heard the sound of her melodic laughter as my sister was ripped away from me or when Aeraf had died.

I couldn't have been farther from the truth.

Agony had not yet wrapped her claws around my heart, had not forced my soul to remain in my body no matter how hard it wriggled and struggled in her embrace.

I was finally able to gasp desperately for air when the scalpel left my arm though it felt as though the limb had been doused in flames, never ending torment as my fingers grabbed at nothingness. Kerminer laughed as I sobbed, trying to gather myself, my thoughts, my emotions but finding myself unable to do so. I couldn't focus on anything else besides the pain, the fire in my arm and my head fell slowly to the left, feeling suddenly heavier then ever before.

My mind was swimming as I watched Kerminer clean my blood from the blade, rubbing the blade between his fingers with a towel. I couldn't hear what he was saying though I could see that his lips were moving, twisted in a maniacal smile as he bounced happily, turning quickly to look at me. My world was growing lopsided, my heart slowing and I couldn't help but feel angry.

Angry at the Eisiau for the torment I was going through.

I hadn't realized I'd passed out until I awoke to the smell disinfectant and a steady, monotonous beeping going in pace with my thrumming heart. Air filtered it's way into my nose and I forced my left arm up to my face, finding plastic tubing decorating my cheeks and two nubs resting loosely in my nostrils. My body felt light, airy and I lowered my arm before looking around slowly, feeling as though my head was the only thing holding my body on the bed. My right arm was wrapped tightly, only my fingers poking out of the top and strapped to my chest. I wore no shirt, only sterile bandages wrapped all the way around my torso and every time I breathed they tightened further to the point where taking any more air then I captured in a gasp was uncomfortable.

Never in my life had I been injured to the point of hopelessness. Kerminer had cut and peeled at my arm, my torso, my legs and was giddy every time he did. It had only been two days since my capture, since Aeraf's death but I was beginning to lose the drive that had gotten me this far. I felt hopeless and I found myself wishing that I had died that day.

Death was a seemingly better option to the hell I was enduring.

The sound of the door whooshing open made my blood run cold and I moved my head, finding Kerminer there with an elated grin on his face.

"Oh, Rusty!" Kerminer sang, clapping his hands together happily. "Do I have a surprise for you!" Pressing my lips together, I put my best glare on and Kerminer placed his hands on his hips. "Oh no need for that look, Rusty. I think you'll be very happy." Shuffling footsteps sounded just beyond the door and Kerminer stepped aside, his grin growing as two men dressed in long white coats dragged a woman with a black hood over her head into the room, her feet struggling to keep pace with the harsh hands of the scientists.