Tell me, where did I go wrong?
What did I do to make you change your mind completely?
When I thought this love would never end
But if this love's not ours to have,
I'll let it go with your goodbye
But there was never a good bye.
I was left there hanging
Thinking about what happen.. to us.. to you?
All of this happened, last July of my 3rd year college.
Nanahimik lang naman ako sa “little world” na kinagagalawan ko eh, I don’t have lots of friends but I have few real ones.
Then you came without me noticing it.
4th of July, you messaged me thru facebook, nagpakilala ka sakin.
Yes, I do remember you.
Siya yung kumanta and nag-gitara nung debut nang classmate ko noong high school last week.
Chinito, maputi, matangakad, musician.
“Delikado ‘to” I told myself
But you’re surprisingly persistent kahit di kita nirereplayan you keep on saying weird things like
“Ang ganda ng moon tonight, tingnan mo” or “Gayle, may knock-knock ako”
So, nireplyan ko na din, kulet eh. Hmp!!
Then we keep messaging each other everyday, as in walang mintis. Ang dami pala naming pagkakaparehas, like favorite food “daing na bangus” or principles in life or same kaming maingay pero hindi vocal kapag feelings na pinag-uupasan. We’re both awkward and weird.
Then he got my number.
Text dito, text doon. Binubusit na nga ako ng mga kaklase ko na bakit daw parang ang saya ko lage kahit di naman.
Naalala ko pa nung nagka-family problem ako, nag-away sila mama at ate tapos, ikaw agad sinabihan ko, then you said those words that would comfort me. You told me I’m lucky since I have a complete family since your older brother died nung 4 yrs old ka at 7 yrs old ang kuya mo. Sabi mo konti lang memories nyo kaya di mo naman siya ganong namimiss pero alam kong nalulungkot ka padin.
Isang gabi, bigla mo nalang tinanong sakin kung anong problema, sabi ko “Wala naman, why?“ but then you know me so much that I can’t hide something from you. Actually that day, nagka-alitan ang barkada namin
And those kinds of days went on and on and on… daig mo pa nga ata bestfriend ko eh. You understand me more than I understand myself.
Then you left.
Few days.. then 1 week walang paramdam.
Our last message was like this
Craig: o tapos anong nangyari?!
Me: hahaha napagalitan ako sa lit prof ko >.<
Craig : Hala ka hahaha !
Me: Geez. May assignment pala kami sakanya! Azar.
Craig: O edi gawin mo, 9 pm na, 7am pa pasok mo bukas!!
Me: Huhu T_T I know. Oshaaa, byeee
Sana palang di ako agad nag good bye.
Naghintay ako ng “good morning” text mo pero wala.
Or nang “good luck sa midterm exams!” … wala din
Then I felt at lost.
I know were friends, but are we something, a step further than that?
I was the girl who was always scared to take the risk, you…
You always give me courage.
I… like you.
2 weeks have passed and you didn’t message me.
I *kinda* checked on your social networking sites and you seemed… happy and not busy at all
Then you’re mom’s bday came.. naalala ko pa September 30 yon.
I took a deep breath and sent a text message to you.
Me: Hey! Happy birthday to your mom, remind her to always take care of her health
After 3 mins…
Craig: Haha, will do that. Thanks!
Me: You should. Hope your having a great time
Then.. wala na.
Parang wala lang.
Umasa lang ba ako?
May nagawa ba ako?
May nangyari ba?
Pero bakit nagpumilit kang pumasok ka sa buhay ko kung iiwan mo din ako?
Thanks. Thanks for the pain.
