Poe Dameron Oneshots/Imagines

Stuck

(A/N: This chapter is inspired by the lyrics to the song Stuck by Imagine Dragons! The lyrics will be in italics!) 

TW: Dark/Bad thoughts 

You were the laugh, you were the life, you were the party

You were the brave, I was the weak, you were the army. 

He was always doing this. Jumping in an X-Wing and blowing things up. But when he wasn't doing that, life was perfect. Well except for the looming death that could fall upon you guys at any moment due to the First Order. 

This time however, the odds didn't seem to be in your favor. When you stayed behind to finish up repairs on some X-Wings, Leia pulled you aside and told you that the Resistance is significantly outnumbered in this fight. Your heart plummets when she tells you this, and you decide to go distract yourself. 

As you walk back to your room, thoughts come creeping in. Whenever Poe goes out on a mission, the thoughts of "how you don't do anything important like he does" or "how you can't protect him like he does you" cross your mind. Usually, they go away after an hour or so and then Poe is back in your arms. This time... not so much. 

The thoughts fill your head and they don't stop swirling, especially after what Leia told you. 

"You aren't good enough for him."

"You're useless."

"You can't protect anyone you love."

"You are the reason bad things happen to people."

"You are weak." 

You tidy around your room, moving back and forth until you finally can't take it anymore. You feel the hot tears running down your face as you imagine Poe in his X-Wing all alone. Ever since you got together with Poe, people have told him that you aren't good enough for him. He always says they're wrong of course, but deep down, you know they're right. 

You and Poe don't really talk about it much, but one time, you got so deep in your head that you told him you needed a break. You guys only took a week-long break, but most people don't know that because Poe left on a mission the day after you told him you needed a break. However, once Poe returned, you apologized and you both came out of it stronger than ever. 

Time goes by and still I'm stuck on you,

Well time goes by and still I'm stuck on you.

No matter how hard you try to distract yourself, you can't seem to get Poe out of your head. Every thought comes back to him and how he is constantly putting his life at risk to protect everyone. You can feel your eyes starting to close slowly the more you cry. You move to your bathroom and you look in the mirror to see a splotchy, swollen face with messy hair and bloodshot eyes. You sigh. 

"I'm gonna look like hell in the morning."

You decide to go find Rose and ask if she needs any help with whatever it is she's doing. You find her cleaning some old speeders and join her. Hours pass and you somehow manage to forget your worries about Poe for a couple hours. You joke and laugh with Rose while flinging soap on each other. 

Once you two finish cleaning the speeders, Rose walks with you to operations to talk to Leia about the mission. Rose tells you she'll wait outside while you talk to Leia. You enter the room and stop dead in your tracks. 

"Hey sweetheart." That familiar voice says. 

Your eyes fill with tears as you see Poe standing beside Leia across the room.