Back to You - Sequel to Locked Away In Heart

You Before Me

Have you ever heard of the notion 'happily ever after'? Does it exist? Can people live without trouble in their paradise? Sadly, it is not possible. Life is like water, flowing through the ups and downs. Sometimes we do have the phase in life where just like the water flowing through a deep river is still and that's the moment we mistake as happily ever after. 

I was no different to take the lull in life as happily ever after. It's been two years since Chandni and Aman got married and 6 months since I had asked Jiya out. After Chandni, I never thought I could experience love again but I was wrong. Love happens, more than once. I will always love Chandni, no one can change that. She is the first girl I ever loved, she is the first one who made my heart flutter and sent a chemical rush in my brain. She will always be the one who gave me immense happiness, pain and the strength to overcome it. My heart still hurts when the reality hits that she is not in my life the way I wanted her to be. There are nights when her memories, her love that could have been, knocks the doors of my heart and rattle my existence. There are moments when I am standing in a room full of people and find myself alone with her memories. There are moments when I am praying to god and I ask for Chandni's happiness with Aman and I also ask for a time-traveling machine so that I can go back in time and fix us to save us both from the heartbreak. 

Do wishes like these make me bad? No, it makes me human. 

Chandni has left a void, a pain in my heart that no one can fill. Not even Jiya's love. Yes, I Jiya loves me and I love her too. But, I can never love her the way I loved Chandni. I guess she knows this and it hurts her. I know it does but I am helpless. The more she tries to replace her, the more I feel the void. How do I tell her that she has her own place in my heart and all she needs to do is cement it.

My chain of thoughts broke when I heard the phone ringing, it was Jiya. I smiled as I slid the green button to talk to her. "Thank god, you are alive" she spoke. "What?" I was puzzled. "I thought you are dead or in a coma because I have been trying to call you for last 10 mins. Mr. Rathore if you forgot, I am coming to Kolkata today. I am at the airport and exactly two hours from now you have to pick me up from Kolkata airport."

"Don't worry. I'll be there" I disconnected the call. I have been in Kolkata for the last two months as dad had a heart attack and he had to undergo open-heart surgery. I have been running my business from Kolkata with Abhik and Reeva handling everything in Mumbai. The physical distance between us has caused some emotional distancing too. We have been fighting way too often these days so to ease out the situation Abhik and Reeva suggested I invite her to Kolkata and make her meet my parents. It would give her a sense of belonging and I agree its not a bad idea. It's just meeting and nothing more than than. So hence Jiya is vising us for a week. 

I looked at the time and decided to leave for the airport considering Kolkata's heavy traffic. Picking up my car keys and shades I opened the door to find one person standing there whom I wasn't expecting. 

Aman!

He looked terrible and disgruntled. His shirt was untucked from places, sleeves were folded shabbily, his hair was disoriented and his eyes were red with huge dark circles. It seemed he was crying a lot and hasn't slept in days. 

"Can I come in?" his voice choked and a chill ran through my spine. His eyes were dark, lost of all hope and that sank my eyes. I was rooted at the door unable to speak or move.

"Aman" maa's frantic voice brought me back to reality. She too was equally shocked to see his state but she managed to hold his hand and get him inside. Maa made him sit on the sofa and I followed Aman as she went into the kitchen to get some water for him. 

He gulped down the whole glass at once as if he has been thirsty for ages. He kept the glass on the table and sat in silence looking at the floor. Maa and I exchanged looks and waited for him to say something but Aman was not ready to break his silence.

With every passing moment, the air became thick with tension. My heart was throbbing so hard that I felt it would jump out of my body. It was like we were waiting to be hit by a truck that would crush us to death. My patience started to wear off with all the negative thoughts and I couldn't keep calm anymore. 

"Aman, what is wrong? Speak up?" I literally shouted but he still kept mum. "Unbelievable" I swore under my breath. "Suraj calm down and let me handle this" finally maa stepped in. She sat next to Aman, caressed his hair with all her love and called out his name "Aman beta."

I don't know if it was her touch or the love in her voice but Aman hugged maa and broke down. His wails echoed across our house and pierced my soul. What dark storm is going to hit us? is Chandni okay? Is her happiness in some kind of danger? 

Question, questions, and more questions. 

At that moment I prayed to every god that if I have ever been a good human if I had ever prayed to them with my whole heart please let there be no danger. I don't know if God exists but if he does then this is the moment where he proved it. 

Aman's wails won't stop, he cried and cried so much that now he was in hiccups. Maa asked me to get some water for him as she rubbed his back to make him comfortable. By the time I brought water even dad was up hearing his cries. He sat on the couch in front of maa and looked at me with worried eyes. Sadly, I had no answer to give to him so I just shook my head.

Finally, ending our long wait and anxiety Aman pulled himself away from maa. He wiped his tear with his sleeves. Papa offered him water but he refused. He took an envelope from the jacket he was carrying. He pushed the envelope towards me. "What is it?" I asked as I picked up the envelope. 

My hands were trembling and I felt a chill engulfing me as I looked at it. I was staring at the huge logo of Apollo Hospitals. My heart sank a bit more when I opened it and took out the bunch of reports. I tried to make sense out of those papers but couldn't understand much. All I got from those papers was it related to something about MRIs and what struck with me was the patient's name. 

"Aman, what is wrong with you?" I asked. Maa and papa looked at me perplexed and anxious. He rubbed his face vigorously before letting out the most dreaded words I ever heard in my life. 

"I have a malignant tumor in my brain."

His words took away the wind out of my lungs. For a moment I felt this was all a nightmare. "you are joking right?" I asked him. Not sure why I asked him that question but I still asked him. 

"Suraj, do I look like someone who would joke about his death?" he mocked me. I so wanted to be a prank or a joke but it wasn't.

The storm has finally hit us.