Yellow Ledbetter

Broken glass, Shattered soul

A symphony of broken glass shattering across the room. Explosions rippling through hundreds of ears, throwing bodies like they're leaves and snapping bones ring through the air with falling bells. This cannot be erased.

Try as they might, and they're trying so damn hard, no one is going to forget Kai Parker.

'The sun!' Nora looks so happy to see it, he should feel a little guilty for what he's about to do. Should but he doesn't. In fact he just wants to get it over with and go see his gal as soon as possible.

'Lily will be this way.' He marches in a certain direction and turns to see why they're not following.

'Surely she would be at the Salvatore residence? Is it not this way?'

God damn it Oscar.

He chooses now to have a clever moment?

Now?

With a dramatic sigh;

'Insominus.' Kai's hand drops along with their unconscious bodies. This would have been so much easier if they were awake. Now he has to carry seven full grown vampires to the docks. Even with magic it's a chore.

Locking them inside a shipping container is best for everybody. He doesn't want a group of hundred year old Heretics adjusting to the modern world and interfering with whatever he decides to do.

The next thing he does is go and see her. It's barely evening by the time he gets to Whitmore but grandma is in bed already. She's the only one in the room, her roomies must be out doing the Salvatore brothers. It's probably a good thing the blonde one is scarce if she doesn't have her emotions back.

Bonnie is the shivering lump on the single bed by the right wall. He knows because her entire being assaults his senses the second they're near each other. Body asleep, but her magic is bounding up to his and he lets himself enjoy it for a second. The attention is nice, invisible but she still makes him feel seen.

She's even smaller up close as he hulks over her tiny frame. So he crouches by her pillow, nose to nose and he can feel her soft snores on the back of his neck. Bonnie always looks so peaceful when she's sleeping. He'd have to be a monster to wake her. So instead he just stares and thinks.

Thinks about how he stabbed her, shot her, siphoned her, abandoned her. Now she's paid him back in kind. He knows how it feels. It's terrible. Worse than terrible, awful. And he doesn't know if he can forgive her for causing him this pain even though he knows he deserves it.

But Bonnie didn't deserve any of the things he did to her. She was just trying to stop him from hurting people. No matter how bad he feels, she must be infinitely worse.

He's hit with all her fear, pure horror from her time with him. Does remorse never stop, even if he's trying to be good? So what's the point of it? No matter what he does he'll always feel guilty, so why not just be him? Be Malachai. Be the villain she wants him to be.

Because he doesn't want to be the villain to her hero.

He doesn't want to be the bad to her good.

He wants to be the Clyde to her Bonnie but it's never going to happen.

And it's tearing him apart.

Kai stumbles out of the dormitory, sinking into an armchair by the grandfather clock in the hallway downstairs. Glancing up he sees he barely lasted five minutes in the same room as her sleeping form.

There's not a single scratch on him but he feels like he's being feasted on by Heretics again.

And he wishes he could turn them off.