Your the reason i am still here ~ Jai Waetford love story.

Chapter 5: Where it all began..

It was a typical Monday morning, I was still in bed, but I heard my phone beeping and beeping. I turned over and grabbed it. They were all text messages. My heart sunk, tears soon began to escape my eyes. I was balling my eyes out. What the fuck? all of the text messages were 'kill yourself you unwanted slut', 'no one likes you here, so just neck yourself' and 'your a slut, Jai doesn't even want you'. I swear it's that girl, that I bumped into and apparently her and Jai had a thing or something, I don't even know. But I don't want to find out. I turned my phone off, I whipped my eyes.

I got into the shower, washing off myself. I found a razor, from when I used to cut. I had mixed emotions. But I got the razor, I held it on my wrist, I pressed down and slid it across my wrist. I watched all the blood pour out. I put the razor back. I got out of the shower, I dried myself and put on my school uniform. I put a black cardigan on to hide my cut. I applied my make up, I put my hair up in a messy bun.

Dad, drove me to school. I got out of the car, I saw Jai and his group. I just walked slowly behind them, making sure they wouldn't notice me. I was to afraid to talk to him, to be honest. I got into the school gates, I started walking faster over to Mia and the girls. They all gave me a hug. I sat down with them. They were talking about x-factor. They were also talking about my dad.. Except they don't know he's my dad. They were saying how much they love him and how good looking he is. This just felt UN comfortable for me right now. But I just put on a fake smile and kept smiling. I saw Jai walking to the lockers by himself, I ran after him. I got up to him as I swung my arms around him, he lifted me up as I put my legs around his waist, he lifted me up by my butt.

"Hey bubs" I whispered in his ear, he smiled, he kissed me, as I pulled away he put me back down.

"I missed you, Sharns" Jai said as he opened his locker.

"I missed you to" I replied back making Jai smile.

"Tomorrow, do you wanna go to the movies together? like a date.." Jai said, he sounded so shy when he added in 'like a date'.

"I would love to!" I said, I smiled. But I don't know if my smile was fake or real. I felt my wrist bleeding from my cut this morning, I ran off and into the girls toliets. Thank god no one was in there. I quickly got some toliet paper, wetted it, I lifted up my sleeve, I put it on the blood for it to be soaked up, it stung heaps. It stopped bleeding as I cleaned up all the blood. I flushed the paper down the toliet.

I sat down in the toliets for a while, I didn't want to go to class anyway. As all these memories of how I was depressed a year ago, all the memories of how I was bullied through so much pain. How much they kicked me, the torture, how I tried to kill myself by over dosing, but then someone found out and rushed me off to hospital. I started to cry, thinking about all this. How it could just be all coming back, right now. I didn't want that at all. I just want to be happy, don't I deserve happiness?