The Guy in Pink

Part 2

MY 18th birthday is coming and I’m picking my guest. Just a week before my birthday I just saw a picture of you and one my alumni cadet officer. I didn’t know that you were friends. I’m thinking that how the hell I didn’t see you If you were friend by my alumni cadet officer. Days passed by and Mr. V. He is the one that I’m reffering as my alumni cadet officer. I’m with my accountancy friend and as far as I remember it was the 9th of October. I saw him and asked if he can attend my birthday celebration on the 11th day of October. He answered yes to me. Out of the blue, without thinking what will happen, I told Mr. V if he can also bring you. He asked who? I didn’t answer. Then he asked again whose the one Im going to bring? I was afraid. My friend told Mr. Villanueva that it was you. Well she told him only the initial of your surname then Mr. V figured it out so easy. He told us that is it B.? And we nod to let him know that he is correct. Mr. V  told me that he will bring you I thought it was only a joke. But I laughed at myself Mr. V is a man of a one word. When he say he would do it.

I’m afraid and a little bit excited in the thought that you will be there in my birthday celebration. It was Friday that night when Mr. V pm-ed me in face book. He asked me if that tomorrow is my celebration I answered him yes and he added that he will bring you. I was so shocked and reply him ‘’Jusko sir wag po’’.  I’m thinking that thought for the whole night, what will happen if you came around?

The day has come it was 11th day of October it is my day. I’m busy texting my friends to come up early and don’t even try to come up late. Someone is fixing my hair when Mr. V called me on phone, He asked me what time is the party I told him six, he added that he have a company of two people. I was shocked. I asked him if he was with you and he answered yes. Parts of me get nervous I’m so fat and I’m not ready to meet him. I only told myself that maybe Mr. V is only joking.  Mr. V called again and saying that they are already there at the venue I was so depressed. Just a six of my guests are there and I’m so disappointed with them. When we arrived at the venue I saw a three guys sitting on the floor. I saw Mr. V  with the other one and you. When I got my feet on the ground I ran towards the Comfort room and make myself under control. You were there. I saw you. You were wearing a pink polo and it looks perfectly suited on you. I’m busy counting 1-100 in my mind to get my anxiety back when Mr. V called me again. He’s asking where I am. I told him that I am in the toilet, I asked him what are you doing here and he told me that do I want you to go home. Parts of me say yes and the half say no. Mr. V  told me that he will be giving me a one minute to go outside and meet there. I was so hesitant but the way Mr. V  talked he’s got to be so serious. I decided to go outside with a company; I called one of my friend and told her that I’m going to meet you there. I am so nervous, shaking cold hands, sweating armpit and a heart that pounds triple than its normal way. When I got there Mr. V  introduces the two of his company. For the first time I touched your hands. I am giggling and tempting to scream but I make myself under control. Look, you just have a big effect on me and that makes me sad. You do nothing but only seeing you make my heart pounds for a million times than it’s normal beating.

The next moment is blur, super blur. I can’t remember how that happens. I just saw you coming to me with a rose in your hands. You gave it to me and you hold my hips. I’m so confused what do I smell like because you’re smell so good to think that I want to hug you tight, but then I control myself. I can’t control my smile. Come to think of, you were so unreachable and now you were dancing me with a background music of ‘’for all of my life’’. I started the conversation saying sorry to you because I know that Mr. V  dragged you in this. Then it was like I reached the heaven hearing your sweet voice when you answered me its okay. Just a two words but it’s so good to my ears. I keep saying sorry and you also keep saying its okay. Our moments had stopped because it’s time for the other. I wish I could dance you forever, I wish I could be that close to you. It’s just took a minutes but it feels like forever.

I thought that will be the last time that I will be near to you. When I look at your direction I saw you playing on your psp and looks like you’re bored. But then after the intermission of my childhood friend, Mr. V came along to me and told me that you’re going to sing a song for me. I was so shocked and he told me while grinning ‘’ayaw mo pa?’’ and me as a risk taker answered him ‘’ sige sir, kausapin ko yung emcee’’. I told the emcee about the sudden change of plans. The emcee talks in front of the visitor and call you in front because you’re going to sing a song. I looked at you and I was hurt because you were also shocked and looks like you can’t do anything about it, you have no chance so you stood up and go in front. I know that you were nervous I saw your trembling hands. The moment you hold the guitar I remembered that you have a girlfriend. While you’re setting the guitar looked at your table and saw them smiling widely. I mouthed ‘’may girlfriend yam’’ and Mr. V also mouthed ‘’wala na sila’'. I was so relief but as you started to strum the guitar I can’t take away the thought of you and your exgirlfriend. I know to myself that even though you end you’re relationship with her there’s no possibility that you will be mine. But then part of my brain keep saying to enjoy my night. So I did. Eventhough I know the song is not for me I still think that you sang it for me. I’m so pathetic right? Your voice got me. It melts my heart everytime you reached the chorus part. And then again you’re so good to be true. After you sing I thought that will be our last encounter.

But then when Mr. V told me that your 3 is also need to go with your friends I get sad. I'm thinking that this will be the end. I keep thanking Mr. V for his gift. And the surprisingly happen is when we shake our hands and you pull me closer to hug me. And that’s all because of Mr. V. Try to imagine you hugged me. Oh and I forgot we also have a picture together (JUST THE TWO OF US FOR LAUGHING OUT LOUD) that was the happiest day of my life. That was sooooo good to be true. Then I saw the three of you leaving the venue.

Next morning I was so surprised that someone tagged me a photo. IT was a photo of me and you.  You made it your profile picture. I was so happy. To the point that I can’t even say a word to express my feelings.   I’m so blessed. Imagine my crush make our picture together as his profile picture. I also want to change my DP and make it same to you but I was thinking that what will you think if I did that. So I erase that thought. I think that day you posted a status on facebook that you’re bored and you want someone to talked to. I’m so willing to talk to you that day but to think that you’re just bored it makes my heart flinch. But then my friend gave you my number and I’m thinking why you texted me. I really want to reply on your text but I remembered that you’re just bored so I didn’t. You have my number and I have yours. You send me a message but me I can’t. I’m so happy that you’re sending me messages even though I know that was a group message at least you know of my existence. My friend told me to reply or to text to you also but I refused. Know what? I’m starting to think that there will be a chance between you and me. I assumed. So that, I’m thinking I must avoid you. But you just keep beeping my phone. Every time you send e a message I have this urged to reply on you. I’m secretly smiling every time you send a group a message. You really have a big effect on me.

My friends keep teasing me. They’re also asked me why I didn’t reply on you. Simply I’m avoiding the pain. Part of me assumed that if I pursue this feeling there will be a chance. But there’s also a part of me that saying that ‘’oh Nollian, don’t be fool you knew it from the very start. He’s unreachable and you are just nobody.’’ So every time my friends ask me I keep saying that ‘’It’s nothing’’. Maybe you are just being friendly. And the thought of that make my heart ache.

It was 14th of October everyone is telling me that I’m blooming. What a ridiculous thought. I just laugh on it. WE talked on facebok and we text. I’m so happy and still confused if it’s really happening.

 October 15, that night you send a message that you’re still in love with her. It hit me. Literally and emotionally. I put all my courage just to start a conversation with you. I texted you ‘’then tell her’’ and that was the start of our good conversation. I’m pushing you to continue or do something just save your relationship with her but the truth is I really want to tell you that stop chasing her and be mine. I didn’t have courage to say that thing. You know what’s really hurt? It is when you’re texting the guy that you admire but he’s telling you about his heartbreak. If I can only do something for you just to ease the pain that you’re going through. WE talked a lot about your relationship that night.